


Save Me

by DisturbedPsychology



Series: Save Me [1]
Category: the GazettE
Genre: M/M, Past Child Abuse, Phobias, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-04
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2018-07-12 02:09:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 29,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7080334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DisturbedPsychology/pseuds/DisturbedPsychology
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kouyou Takashima is part of the japanese elite. One day he receives an invitation for a millionaire auction on a well-known restaurant/bar called "Toxic". The actions of a perverted man lead him to buy a...person?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Auction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuu thinks he is going to spend another usual birthday, Kouyou thinks it's just another monotone day
> 
> But faith thinks it's time for them to meet each other

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For your help, they look like this: 
> 
> [Kouyou](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/81/99/0b/81990b24c244d6bd0b28575f87470bc0.jpg)  
> [Yutaka](http://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/e35/p480x480/13628458_1777441375833077_341620770_n.jpg?ig_cache_key=MTI5MzAzNzAwNTMyNzg4MzQ4MQ%3D%3D.2)  
> [Yuu](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/c8/c9/8c/c8c98c5c5e7fc705a7495988c18a2aae.jpg)  
> [Takanori](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/c3/6a/c0/c36ac08e0e8cb7a9177c9e54b43dadfa.jpg)  
> [Akira](http://s77.photobucket.com/user/cruzin4crazy/media/the%20GazettE/Reila/Reita/Reila16.jpg.html)

-With this we end the meeting gentleman…any questions?-

A tall, slim and brunette man points at a screen with designs of an exotic car and graphics of budgets in perfect order. His hair is short a little past his jawline, he’s dressed with dark pants, a black vest and a blazer of the same color. There’s a dark cross hanging low on his chest accompanied by a small silver necklace, luxurious and expensive bracelets decorate his wrists alongside a golden watch.

His gaze looks expressionless, uninterested while he looks to the table in front of him and the five men around it. Everyone nods, convinced of the proposal.

-It’s perfect- one of them said, he was around sixty years old  
-I think it’s a very beautiful car, it will definitely sell and it’s a great continuation to our previous model- said another, a little younger than the last  
-Very well then. I send the designs to the production department. Its production will surely start by the end of the month- answered the brunette man

Everyone took their stuff, bowed and leaved the minimalist meeting room.

Only one of them stayed alongside the brunette man

-Thank you for saving my ass, man…I knew I had to do the showing for the new car today but…I really forgot-  
-Only ‘Thank you’? This is your idea Yutaka, at least defend it-  
-Kouyou…I…I’m sorry, I’m really sorry-  
-Forget your apologies, don’t do it again-

With no futher word, he left the meeting room alongside the other man, walking right behind him.

Kouyou Takashima is the CEO of Hellion. A company dedicated to the manufacturing of sport cars for the rest of the world. Lately, they broke the language barrier and the usual isolation of Japan to break records and top the most important lists. Many critics started calling them “The Japanese Lamborghini”

Right now, they tried to launch an ambitious proposal: A vehicle that was fast, safe and elegant. Something that would end up crushing the competition and left them dumbfounded…and they found it, the proposal came of out the brilliant mind of the vice-president, Tanabe Yutaka, but said vice-president didn’t have a really good memory (neither a really good PA) so he forgot completely about the showing to the rest of the directors board.

So Kouyou, using the graphics and the construction plans that were handed to him previously, controlled the situation and saved Yutaka.

Yutaka walked right behind him like a scared and lost puppy in search of his owner, he was his boss after all…even if he was his brother. Kouyou had a cool temperament, you rarely saw him happy yet you never saw him angry. In this kind of situations he always react on a calm way and seeks for solutions instead of blaming people. Maybe that’s why he became the boss…

-Yutaka, why are you following me?- Kouyou asked while he opened the door to his office and immediately walked to his desk. Retaking the work he left behind because of the showing.

Kouyou office was rather small for a CEO. He had a dark, wood desk right at the middle of the place. A desktop computer, some portraits, a box full of pencils and a bunch of paperwork were the only things on top of his workplace. He also had an artificial plant at the corner, two chairs in front of the desk and a big window to his right side. Pretty cold and lifeless but perfect for his tastes.

Yutaka froze right outside the office door…he was just trying to spend a little bit of time with Kouyou, trying to guess if he was mad or not. He played with his fingers rather nervously and then mumbled

-Uhm…nothing special, really-

Yutaka was a really gentle guy. He had long, hair all the way to his shoulders slightly wavy and brunette. His clothes consisted on an all-black outfit of boots, pants, sleeveless shirt and a coat that revealed a little bit of his chest. He was a little more muscular than Kouyou.

-Then, what are you waiting? Get back to work-

Kouyou never stopped watching the papers on his hands while he said this. Just when Yutaka wanted to add a little more to the conversation, the sound of high-heels clicking on the floor got louder with each step. The young secretary turned right outside the corner, she started working on the company a month or two ago, Kouyou fired the last one because she was “useless” and “lazy”.

The girl worked has a personal assistant for both Kouyou and Yutaka and right now she held two dark packages in her hands. Yutaka immediately ran to her, trying to help her and showing her his million dollar smile making the girl blush and stutter.

-Good morning Kaede!- Yutaka greeted in an effusive way –What is this?-  
-Uhm…well, this are for you both, sir. Someone left them at the mailbox with your names-  
-Who was it Kaede?-

Kouyou cold voice rang on the empty office while he was signing an important document

-Uhm…I-I…I-I didn’t see sir-  
-I know you didn’t, that’s not your work. Didn’t the postman tell you?-  
-N-no sir…H-he just told me it was for you-  
-Thank you for accepting unknown packages Kaede. You’re doing a great job with our security-

Yutaka interrupted all of sudden, trying to prevent the dismissal of the month.

-Well! Don’t blame the poor girl ok? The packages are perfectly sealed Kouyou, I’m sure they’re safe-

The boss sighed

-You can go Kaede. I send you the designs of the new model in a few minutes, make sure they arrive to the production department before five o’clock got it?-  
-Y-Yes sir-

The girl turned and quickly walked out of the office like her heels where on fire. Yutaka only shook his head with a smile at the clumsiness of the girl. Kouyou was lost on his paperwork world, not even paying attention to the packages that Yutaka put on his desk

-Hey…aren’t you going to see this?- Yutaka pushed the object towards him  
-It’s not important-

The vice-president only shrugged and started opening his own pack. Slowly breaking the tape and paper around it until he finally opened it. There was a small piece of paper with a handwriting on it

-It’s an invitation- he whispered  
-An invitation to what?-  
-I don’t know. It has something written in it-

_“Mister Tanabe Yutaka:_

_Greetings. I know you belong to one of the sections of our population that is high-class and sophisticated. Something everyone knows has “Elite” and that’s why I decided to send you an invitation to our monthly auction. Maybe you heard of it before._

_You could find objects from around the world that may interest you. Everything you have ever searched for, heard of or saw it’s surely here. I assure you_

_Please come to the restaurant called “Toxic” right at the center of the city_

_Sincerely  
Ruki”_

Yutaka read the message out loud with a raised eyebrow. He heard of that auction before and he surely heard of the restaurant. Some of his closest friends went constantly to that place, telling him that he could find really interesting things totally worth of a collection. That place was some sort of a secret organization to him: A lot of mystery around it and only a few could enter

But he’s ready to take the invitation, even if his brother didn’t want to

-Toxic huh?-

Kouyou looked at him, leaving his papers on the desk. Finally there was something that caught his attention.

-My invitation says the same-  
-Are you going to the auction Kouyou?-  
-Why not? Maybe we can finally find that Wurlitzer piano that mom so desperately wants-  
-All right! If you go, I go. I’m sure I can buy more things than you, loser!-  
-Yutaka…how old are you?-  
-28 Why?-  
-Forget it-

Kouyou thought he would die from all the stress of listening to his little brother innocent and naïve conversations.

__________________________________________________________________

-Happy birthday to you~ Happy birthday to you~-

Yuu slowly opened his eyes when he heard a faint singing on his room. A smiled appeared on his face as soon has he recognized the voice. He stretched a bit before sitting on the bed, scratching his eyes.

-Hey- the man in front of him greeted with only one of his hands while the other held a cake with two candles –Happy birthday Yuu-

Takanori was his name. He had a big smile on his face and dressed in a real casual way in comparison to the expensive suits he wore during nights while he took care of the restaurant. This ritual: Waking him up with the “Happy birthday” song and giving him a cake, it’s something that he been doing since Yuu could remember.

-You’re so annoying- Yuu whined but still smiled and kicked off his sheets –Why don’t you wait until I wake up?-  
-I wouldn’t be a surprise then. It’s better when you wake up like this, your smile it’s beautiful-

Takanori left the cake on top a small table at the side of Yuu bed and he spread his arms wide open.

-Come here. I have to give you a hug-  
-Taka! This is really embarrassing!-  
-Shut up and come here Yuu-

Yuu stood up and he was quickly surrounded by Takanori arms. Yuu soon answered the hug with the same strength, hiding his face on the crook of his neck, breathing in his wonderful fragrance.

-Happy 20th birthday Yuu- Takanori voice got softer and his hug got a little tight –I’m proud of you, you know? I remember when you were ten-  
-Hey, that means you are also getting older-  
-You spoil the moment, brat- Yuu burst out laughing  
-I’m sorry old man!-

They broke the hug and Yuu immediately assaulted the cake on the table. It was his favorite flavor, Takanori never forgot that. He took a bit of the icing with his index finger and slowly tasted with his tongue. Takanori was hypnotized by the sight…he really wanted to kiss Yuu right now…

He took a couple of steps to the front, Yuu back was totally pressed against his chest…

And he hugged him once more

-Don’t be so clingy!- Yuu shouted, took a lot more of icing with his finger and then smeared it all over Takanori nose and mouth. He only laughed and broke the hug.

He reached a bit with his tongue and then nodded a few times

-Mhm…it’s really good. I got it this time-  
-Last year the cake sucked…tasted like jelly bean-  
-Don’t hold any grudges for that ok? I thought you liked lemons-  
-I hate them!-

Takanori and Yuu lived together since a long time ago. Takanori is fifteen years older than the raven-haired man and Yuu saw him as a role model, someone he should follow, a hero. He loved to live with the blond, he had a perfect and calm life.

Yuu works for Takanori at Toxic, taking care of the register and somethings as a waiter. The blond had no need for work, he came from a filthy rich family who leaved him full of cash but…why would Yuu complain? It was his money anyways, he bought Toxic for millions, the least he could do is making some money out of it.

Their house had two floors, completely white. Yuu had his own room, Takanori had own of his own too, there was also a dining room, a kitchen, living room and a big bathroom with a bathtub. The dining room, where they were sharing their breakfast at the moment, had an extravagant design that matched with the white walls. There was a chandelier hanging just above the dark table and six chairs all over it even if they rarely had visits.

Takanori made breakfast just for Yuu, with everything he liked and the younger man practically ran when he saw all the food, quickly devouring all the food.

-That was delicious!- he shouted when he finished while Takanori washed the dirty dishes

-Really? You better like it! I woke up at 4 in the morning to cook it for you!-  
-Eh? 4 in the morning? Did you pick up all the vegetables from the backyard or what?-  
-Nice one, smartass-  
-I’m sorry!-  
-Yeah, yeah. Go and dress yourself all right? We’re going shopping-

Yuu ran quickly to his wardrobe picking some videogame t-shirt and a pair of jeans before running back with Takanori. He waited a lot for this day…he really wanted that black guitar on the music store. Takanori had the money to buy it but…he felt ashamed of asking for presents. Takanori already paid his school fees, that was enough.

The day went by in all kind of stores, Takanori constantly complaining about all the bags he had to carry (alongside a guitar) but it was all worth when Yuu smiled at him and told him ‘Thank you’ with this sweet voice of his.

Finally the night came, and the auction was all set up.

-Do you really need to dress like that?-

Yuu asked, he was sitting on Takanori bed while the blond checked his red suit for the night looking at the mirror.

-It is, I have to look good. It’s auction night remember? Famous people are coming to dump their wallets-  
-Oh really? Can I greet Billy Joel?-  
-Not that famous, kid-  
-Mhm…what about Ayumi Hamazaki?-  
-Well…if you see her, then yeah, greet her-  
-Cool, I’ll ask her to sign my arm so I can get it tattooed later-  
-Yuu…that’s stupid-  
-Come on! You know that is cool as hell!-

Yuu choose his own clothes for the night: A grey suit that fit tightly to his figure. Then he walked to Toxic alongside Takanori. The restaurant was right in front of their home and it looked rather simple on the outside. However, the inside was big and wide, much like a ballroom with chandeliers and lamps hanging from all points of the ceiling.

He could already see all the limos parking at the front of the place, expensive cars and chauffeurs here and there…this looked more like a competition than an auction.

Inside the restaurant, Yuu got close to the bar. The barman was cleaning the glasses and sorting the bottles on the liquor cabinet.

-Hey Akira- Yuu greeted him with his hand –How’s your night?-  
-So far, so good. I already lost count of how many shots I served but…I’m taking good tips and that’s what matters-

Akira was a really, really good guy. He looked tough and sometimes he could be an asshole but he had a heart of gold. He would light up the night with a quick joke or get you free drinks. He had a really long time working at the bar and Yuu usually chatted with him on his free time about soccer or music, Akira gave up his soccer career when he was 20 thanks to a life-long injury on his ankle that won’t show up on his daily life but it just wouldn’t let him play.

Takanori arrived shortly after, making a fist bump with Akira who gave him a cigarette and a lighter as soon has he arrived.

-You should really stop smoking that shit Taka- Yuu scolded him –You’re killing your lungs-  
-Yeah, yeah. I already hear that a lot on the radio and television. Thank you for the reminder-  
-Whatever, when you die your obituary will read: “Death: He tried to be funny”-  
-Hey…those are new guys right?-

Akira interrupted the conversation to point at two men dressed in suits that were just entering the bar. They looked rather young to be business men.

-Now I know who they are!- Akira shouted –It’s Takashima and his brother-  
-Takashima?! Hellion’s owner?!- Yuu immediately turned his head toward Takanori who kept smoking like nothing happened  
-What? I had to invite them, they’re really popular now-  
-Those guys surely brought FBI with them!- Yuu kept complaining

The young guys were starting to attract attention of everyone around them while they sat on one of the only tables that were left. Mumbles suddenly turned into whispers and all the chatting started to annoy Takanori who ordered another of his employees to turn on the music.

-Well, next time you plan to invite them. Take in count that Takashima is a fucking piece of shit- Akira said angrily  
-Wow- Takanori answered between laughs –That was wild man!-  
-Really! The guy is an arrogant dick. He never takes interviews and he has the higher dismissal ranks of the whole country-  
-It sounds to me that he is strict more than arrogant- Yuu answered  
-I fucking hate him, man…I won’t work the next auction if he takes his ass here-

Hours passed by and the restaurant filled with all the guests. A small stage lit up in front of the crowd and Takanori went up the stage to start the auction

Prices were ridiculously high for Yuu…there were people who bought small, shitty things for millions and millions of yens. Soon one of the owners of Hellion placed his money on a famous painting, no one surpassed his offer and at the end, he took the painting home.

However, Yuu would never know what came next

Takanori was still on stage, he presented the big offer of the night: A classic vehicle that belonged to Henry Ford…god where did Takanori found this things? An older man, maybe in his mid-fifties, raised his hand. Takanori pointed at him

-How much?-  
-Five millions for the raven-haired beauty that is close to the bar-

Yuu felt everyone looking at him, even Akira. Takanori immediately answered the man, in the most polite way he could find even if he was boiling with rage.

-He is not on sale, sir. We’re offering the car-  
-How about seven millions?-  
-He is not on sale- Takanori voice raised –He is a person-  
-Come on, we all know this place used to belong to the Yakuza. They sold everything in here…even pretty little things as him-

Yuu felt nauseated, about to throw up all the things he ate in the day. Akira placed a hand on his back and mumbled a soft ‘Are you okay?’. Takanori was about to get off the stage and punch that guy on the face, he could see it on his eyes.

But then a hand raised at the corner of the restaurant and a powerful voice filled the dead silent hall.

-Why don’t we start the offer at 20 million, sir? Would you like that?-

It was Takashima


	2. The Contract

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takanori can't stop Takashima so the least he can do is stop Yuu

Everyone looked confused after the offer from Takashima, now every single gaze landed on the guy. The businessman rose from his seat and cleared his throat. His partner, the one Yuu thought to be his brother, looked at him with expectation.

-Sorry mister, you…the one that stood up. I’m talking to you. Do you like my offer?-

Even the silver haired man was out of words.

Takanori looked at Yuu and their gazes met, anguish reflected in both. They never had to deal with this, the craziest thing they had to deal with was a pair of old ladies fighting over a set of skillets and everyone laughed back then, making a joke or two about it. Now they didn’t know where everything would end.

-I’m okay with your offer- said the old man, no longer smiling

Takanori came back to the microphone and with a deep voice, said

-Well then…the auction starts with 20 million. Anyone else?-

Yuu was completely baffled…Takanori was playing along? But, somehow, they were connected. Takanori turned his head and their eyes made contact for a second time, he mouthed a “Trust me” then continued with the auction.

No one raised their hand

-The offer still in 20 million- Takanori pulled the audience in –No one else?-

The man who started it all, the one who was laughing and bragging about everything he had, turned around and walked through the crowd leaving the restaurant. Takanori didn’t need any signal and closed the auction.

-Ok. Sold to the man at the corner for 20 million-

The entire hall filled with surprised whispers and then with claps and cheers. The auction ended a few minutes after and, while everyone was going home, Takanori jumped from the stage and ran all the way to Yuu who was completely dazed, like a deer caught in the headlights.

-Taka…what is going on?- Yuu whispered, scared  
-Don’t worry ok? Everything is going to be okay-

Takanori took Yuu face in his hands…they were really close that their lips were almost touching. Akira, however, broke the scene.

-Why the fuck did you accept Takanori?!- he screamed, pushing his boss aside

While Takanori and Akira fought, Yuu could see that man…Takashima walked slowly, full of confidence, like a big price was at the end of the road. His brother followed him close.

As soon has he saw Takashima, Takanori got in the middle and placed a hand on the brunette chest…Yuu immediately realized it was a bad idea. He could listen how the CEO held his breath and looked at the hand on his chest full of disgust and anger.

Takashima stepped back

-You touch me again and I rip your face off-

His brother whispered something close to ‘Calm down’, Takanori raised his hands in the air

-Hey dude…we’re cool. I just want to solve this ok? I know you did this only for saving him, I’m sure you don’t care about him-  
-How could you know that?-  
-Well…if you were interested in Yuu, you could’ve placed a higher offer way before the old bastard-

Yuu looked at the pair of brothers. They were nothing alike. He met them a long time ago, not in person but he met them anyway. Takashima, the older, always carried that cold expression and those unexpressive eyes. Yutaka looked a lot more…alive by his side. The raven gaze met with Takashima’s for a brief time.

-Take anything from here, anything you want- Takanori insisted with Takashima  
-I didn’t pay for ‘anything’- Takashima answered  
-You haven’t even paid yet, you asshole!- Akira screamed from behind the bar counter –There’s no deal!-

Yutaka didn’t notice Akira until then. However, when the blond saw him he frowned and screamed at him.

-What the fuck are you looking at?!-

The brunette immediately changed the topic

-Kouyou, let’s go. Let’s take the stupid Wurlitzer and that’s it-  
-Come on Yutaka...we shouldn’t leave Ruki like this. He promised me something, this auction promised me something. I’m helping this hellhole with my offer-

Takanori frowned at the comment

-Listen up Takashima…I’m not scared of you or your money. I’m as rich has you are but I’m not going to sell a person just because your spoiled ass says so-

Takashima crosses his arms on his chest

-Enough, please- Yuu complained, running his hands through his face –Can’t we make a contract? At least for a year-  
-20 millions in a year? - Takashima chuckled –Who do you think you are? Derek Jeter?-

Yuu already hated him…Akira was right with every single word he said a few hours ago: This guy was a fucking arrogant son of a bitch. His company wasn’t that good anyway…

-But…considering you’re working has a waiter, I’m sure you don’t even know what baseball is-

Takashima was a loud-mouth bragging guy and this was getting on Akira nerves. The blond jumped the bar counter and was about to punch Takashima in the face if it wasn’t for Yutaka who got in the middle of them, holding his wrist in the process. Yutaka looked angry and spoke with a powerful voice

-He already told you not to touch him. Are you deaf?-  
-What is the big fucking deal in touching this asshole?!- Akira shouted, pushing Yutaka but taking a few steps back –He is not a fucking god! He is made of bone and flesh!-  
-Shut your fucking mouth already Akira- Takanori hissed –All right Takashima…you’re getting what you want, let’s make a contract-

Half an hour later, after all the commotion they made, they were in Takanori office. It was a small cubicle in the corner of the restaurant and it was used to sign the purchases from the auction. The office had a wood desk, a leather sofa big enough for three people to fit in, chairs, all kinds of collections and expensive paintings hanging from the wall

Takanori leaned on his desk, his face full of doubt. Takashima sat on the leather sofa and Yuu remained at the door.

-Do you accept the contract Takashima?-  
-Not for 20 million-  
-Let’s do this for only a year- Takanori insisted –You don’t have to pay the 20 million if you don’t want to-  
-I’ll pay six-  
-Perfect…let’s sign this. But there’s one rule I have to ask you to respect-

After saying this, Takanori looked back at Yuu…he couldn’t stop looking at him, he was scared of only thinking about losing him in the hands of this brat. After all, Takashima was a good-looking brat.

-Yuu is working with you only has a companion. He can live with you, even work in your company…but you can’t touch him. He’s not going to be your lover-

Those words filled Yuu with calm, more than Takanori could imagine. He felt so free right now…at least he wouldn’t be a slave or some sort. Living with him or working with him was a really easy task.

-I’m okay with that- Takashima replied  
-In case you don’t respect this rule, I’m going to place your fucking picture all over the papers and media of the country so everyone would know how much of a pig you are-  
-I already told you I’m okay with that-

Takashima signed the contract a few minutes after, followed by Takanori and finally Yuu…the raven haired couldn’t believe what he was doing but he didn’t want any kind of troubles for Takanori not even a single one. If he could pay him a little for all the things Takanori did before then he was okay with signing a foolish contract.

-I’ll come back for him in the morning- Takashima said while he was being followed by Takanori to the door of the restaurant –Do you have school tomorrow?-

Yuu felt restless with that pair of cold eyes looking at him…it was enough to make him beg for mercy

-I’m on a break- Yuu replied with a weak voice  
-Good, I see you here at eight o’clock-

And like he was a shadow, a breeze, Takashima vanished from Toxic with everything on his side. Takanori said nothing, he just pulled his cigarette pack from his pocket and placed one on his lips, Yuu tried to talk to him…anything would be enough for breaking the awkward silence between them…but he never dared.

They didn’t talk to each other for the rest of the night

____________________________________________________________

The clock on the wall displayed six o’clock in the morning of January 21st

Yuu woke up before his alarm so he could take a long bath of hot water, hoping that every drop of water wiped out a fragment of his memory then it would be easier to leave Takanori for the very first time in his life. Half an hour after, he was choosing his clothes and packing his favorite outfits on an old backpack meant for holidays and trips.

Takanori and Yuu rarely went on trips, the blond hated crowded places and airports with all his life. They did travel sometimes though, only for the pure fun of it so Yuu had to buy a backpack big enough for this kinds of situations.

While he was packing, he heard his door cracking open slowly. He turned his head to see Takanori right at his door with the same clothes from yesterday, Yuu was completely sure he didn’t even sleep a little. Still, he didn’t looked tired

-Want me to help you packing?-

His deep voice still sounded so sweet, so soft and calm

-No Taka, I’m fine-  
-Mhm…are you hungry? I can make you breakfast before you go-

Oh god…that “before you go” sounded so broken. Yuu felt the lump in his throat and his eyes stinging with tears. He tried to hide his feelings and nodded full of joy. He had to be the same foolish and bouncing Yuu he was every day and stop being so depressed.

-Great! Cook all the things I love-  
-Good, I see you in twenty minutes ok? You have little time left-

Why in the world Takanori looked so strong? Where did he found all that strength? God…he wasn’t even stuttering, he wasn’t hiding in the corners so he could cry, he didn’t even looked worried. But not everyone show their pain in the same way and maybe this was Takanori way of saying ‘It hurts’

Yuu ended up packing in ten minutes and he walked to the dining room. His usual breakfast was on the table, Takanori even made for him a cup of black coffee something that was forbidden in their home because “your stomach is going to thank me later”

They shared their breakfast like any other day…with the exception of the silence. They weren’t flipping each other off nor making jokes, they were just there…enjoying each other in the last hours they had left at least for a year. Takanori pushed his breakfast aside and took a deep breath

He made his choice

There was no turning back right? Yuu would leave with Takashima but before he went away, he would confess his love to him

-Yuu-  
-What is it Taka?-  
-I have something to tell you-

Their gazes met, the ebony dark of Yuu eyes meeting the blue in Takanori and Takanori thought he looked so beautiful like that…he wanted to kiss him, to ravish those lips until both of them ran out of breath…he loved him, he really did. He couldn’t accept other man near him.

But something in his brain made ‘click’

Why was he so sure that Yuu would accept him?

He was fifteen years older than Yuu and the raven looked at him like a father and a great support…what would happened if he never saw him has a lover? How would he take the confession?

Maybe this wasn’t the moment…maybe it would never be the moment

-Taka? You got lost-  
-Oh…I’m sorry-  
-What did you want to tell me?-  
-Nothing really…please take care, remember that I’m waiting for you in here ok? At least give me a call once in a while-

Yuu smiled softly and then sighed. Takanori could be dramatic…

They finished their breakfast and just when they were doing the dishes they heard a pair of knocks on the door. Takanori already knew who it was and he wanted to open the door, punch Takashima in the face and tell him to fuck off for the rest of his life.

Instead of that, he opened the door and made a hand gesture so Takashima could enter

-You weren’t joking about the money…- Kouyou whispered to himself while he looked around

Yuu picked up his bag and when he saw the businessman, he sighed once again.

-Are you ready then? - Takashima questioned  
-Yeah-  
-Let’s go, I’m a busy person-

Kouyou walked out the house, one of his luxurious cars waited for him outside: The first ever Hellion to hit the market. A car almost perfect, Yuu was sure that, for Kouyou, this was more of a Hot Wheels car than a precious collectible.

Just when he was about to cross the door, Takanori held his wrist and pulled him into a hug. Yuu slowly circled his arms around his neck, feeling the tears sliding through his cheeks and landing on Takanori red blazer. This wasn’t the last time he would see him but…damn, a year was such a long time and not even a phone call would do the trick, nothing could replace this kind of moments.

-Take care Yuu- Takanori whispered, tightening the hug a bit more  
-I will Taka…I call has soon as I can ok? Please don’t worry about me-

The sound of Kouyou car horn broke the hug

Yuu looked down, Takanori had entwined his fingers with his own for a long time

And that was the last thing he saw from his best friend that day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...there's a little more revelation of Takanori feelings in here. 
> 
> Let's hope I get this done in 10 chapters lol.


	3. Midnight Talking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuu just signed a contract with a man full of power, money and a big ego. But maybe, in the middle of it all, they have something in common.

Yuu was shocked when he saw the interior of Takashima amazing Hellion

It looked like a spacecraft…full of controls, buttons and handles that he never saw before on a car. Takanori car was rather simple, it was luxurious and comfy but never on _this_ level of exotic. His body vibrated with the sound of the powerful engine and the vehicle started moving in an unknown direction.

The road turned out to be silent, Yuu clutched his backpack to his chest while he thought about Takanori life from now on in the next year…he hoped that the blond took care of himself and tried to survive without cooking only instant noodles or ordering McDonald’s

Since he was isolated in his own world, Yuu never noticed how they reached a ‘business’ sector in the city with elegant hotels and expensive restaurants all over the place. Surprised, the raven haired boy looked through his window like a kid, wanting to know everything about this newly discovered place.

-Where are we going?- he asked with curiosity, looking at the brunette who was focused on the street  
-Breakfast. Is there a problem with that?-

Yuu still thought he was an arrogant bastard, he wasn’t even looking at him

-No…there’s no problem. I thought you wouldn’t even notice me through the way-  
-Do you think I’m doing this for you? I have to work but not on an empty stomach-

Yes, he was an arrogant bastard.

The younger man didn’t pay attention to the restaurant name (he also didn’t pay attention to Kouyou manners when first: he opened the car’s door and, later, the restaurant door for him) but the place looked like some kind of replica straight out of Versailles palace…even this early in the morning, the restaurant was full of people and judging by their clothes a single glass of water will be worth more than 20 dollars

Takashima went quickly to a very exclusive zone in the restaurant, the waiters soon ran to their table and gave him the menu, speaking in a very polite way. So this man was a frequent client of this place huh? Now Yuu was completely sure of how important and famous he was, at least in the business world

Yuu asked for the simplest thing in the whole menu with crazy and extravagant names, Takashima looked at the menu for a large amount of time, he kept looking even when the waiter was already there trying to pick up their orders. He finally decided for something with a French name…Yuu couldn’t remember. Takashima cold and deep eyes looked at him for the very first time in the day and Yuu felt weak, fragile, intimidated…just like yesterday at the auction.

-What’s your name?- said the older man, never leaving the eye contact  
-My…my name?- Yuu stuttered and Takashima did not repeat –Yuu…Yuu Shiroyama-  
-How old are you?-  
-20…I turned 20 just yesterday-  
-Mhm I see- he placed a hand under his own chin, thinking –So the auction was in your name-  
-No, no- Yuu quickly intervened –It was just a normal auction-

The conversation stopped suddenly and an awkward silence came out of nowhere. The waiter placed their food on the table at least half an hour later and Takashima, as soon has he saw is food, started eating. Yuu copied his actions trying to polish all kinds of manners he learned through his life.

A few minutes later, Yuu broke the ice

-So…where’s your brother?-  
-I have no idea, probably still having breakfast with mom. That childish thing-

Yuu felt his lips curving slowly into a smile, Takashima said that sentence without looking away from his food and he sounded so much like a kid…sounded so normal that Yuu thought he looked deadly cute.

-By the way- Takashima finally looked up –You and your father aren’t very much alike-  
-My father? What are you talking about?-  
-Ruki. Isn’t he your father?-

Yuu laughed softly

-Oh no, Taka is just my best friend. Even if he is much older than me-  
-Mhm. That’s weird-  
-It is isn’t? But I really love him, I don’t remember a single day of my life without him-

The raven felt the nostalgia and melancholy creeping up on him…he didn’t want to look weak in front of this man and much less when he looked like he would hunt him at the very first chance. He immediately erased his sad expression and started eating again.

-How about you? You and your brother aren’t alike either-  
-He looks a lot more like my mother, they’re identical-

The awkward silence came back and neither of them said a single word in the rest of their breakfast

An hour later, they went back into Takashima spacecraft and this time they drove to a residential zone in the city that Yuu remembered pretty well. He visited this place with Takanori when he was around 13 or 14 years old and they were searching for a house comfy enough for them to live. Takanori, at the end, refused to live close to big names and business people and he decided to buy their actual house at the far side of the city.

Takashima garage was everything but small, and it seemed he loved to collect cars in general because he had all kinds of beauties: Lamborghini, Cadillac, Koenigsegg, Acura, Camaro…this guy was the exact stereotype of a CEO.

Once he admired all of his cars he finally focused on the big mansion. Of course, it had two floors and painted in white color looking like some kind of baroque design from the outside. Takashima used his manners again, opening the door to his house and the first room shocked Yuu all over again: It was wide, there were a bunch of sofas big enough to fit at least 10 people each, a medium sized coffe table in the center decorated with artificial flowers, stairs made of wood leading to the second floor and a door next to the living room. Yuu thought it was the kitchen but it was closed so he couldn’t sneak around.

Takashima closed the door and immediately a middle age woman came close to him, Yuu thought it was the cleaning lady because of the way she was dressed. She looked shy and scared of the man…

-Good morning Mr. Takashima- the woman made a small bow  
-I need you to clean the room I spoke of. Clean everything and make sure he feels ok-  
-Yes Mr. Takashima-

Yuu didn’t miss the look full of hate that Takashima shot towards the woman and the way he spoke to her…he really was a bastard.

Takashima said no more, he simply took his car keys and left the house yet again. Yuu was left standing in the middle of the room, confused and trying not to look stupid. The woman lead him to the kitchen, telling him to wait there and eat whatever he wanted until she finished cleaning his room.

Yuu didn’t saw Takashima in the rest of the day nor the cleaning lady, he found his room at the end of the big second floor and hoped he had a good one. He was surprised when he saw a bed big enough for two people, a LED screen television and a closet full of clothes that still had the price tags in them, they were completely new. He also had a desk full with school stuff and tools.

He was getting a lot right now…and he was just a ‘guest’

Past midnight, Yuu started hearing things…first mumbles, then hard steps all over the floor, the stairs and outside his door. He was unable to sleep with all that noise so he went out of his room and went down the stairs with care, he seen enough horror movies to know where this was going.

The kitchen door was slightly open and he could see a dim light coming out from it. He walked all the way there and peek inside. Takashima was there, bent over in the middle of the fridge trying to pull out something that was far from his reach. He finally came out with a glass full of water.

He was dressed with a white shirt, a black pair of shorts and bare-footed. Both looked at each other with confusion.

-What’s wrong?- said the older man –Can’t sleep without Teddy?-  
-You don’t say…you scared the hell out of me-  
-You’re a light sleeper. Next time I use my silent feet, I promise-  
-Why you’re such a bastard Takashima?-

The brunette never stopped looking, he drank his glass of water slowly

-Maybe…because it’s my home? I can start drilling a hole in the wall if I want-  
-I have no idea of how I’m going to live with you. You’re an asshole with a stick up his ass-  
-It better be lubed-

Yuu sighed, frustrated and walked out of the kitchen on the way to his room. However, at the middle of the stairs he remembered how this guy bought him a whole set of clothes. He had to thank him

-Takashima, by the way…-

The raven haired stopped shortly, surprised by the fact that Takashima had a bottle of pills in the middle of the table. The business man immediately hid the bottle and Yuu didn’t ask more about it

-Thanks for the closet full of clothes-  
-Oh. You thought it was yours? I talk to that useless woman tomorrow and tell her to clean the closet-

Yuu wanted to scream

He turned yet again, took two steps further and then…

-It’s okay Shiroyama. I hope they fit-

The raven smiled

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo...Yuu gets to know more about the sarcastic, piece of S personality of Kouyou.  
> I'm back writing this thing and now I hope is the good one
> 
> Thank you very much for reading!


	4. Hate and Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fear brings pain, pain brings hate...and hate can make a man make the most vile, disgusting things 
> 
> Kouyou is no exception

Yuu visited the great “Hellion” corporation two weeks after moving to the Takashima mansion

In those two weeks, he barely saw the businessman. He managed to make a good bond with the cleaning lady…she was so kind and so cute that, just thinking about the way Takashima treated her, made him feel useless and angry. He really wanted to defend her.

Her name? Midori. She is around 27 years old and she dreamed of studying in the Tokyo University, a lot of situations (that she never told Yuu) stopped her from reaching that dream. Her mother also worked with Takashima in the cleaning service but she was in charge of the big Hellion building…

-Takashima-

Yuu sat on the living room, in the sofa closest to the door. He waited all day long until the sound of keys finally reached the lock and certain brunette walked through the door, closing it behind him. He looked deadly tired but his expression immediately turned somber when he saw the young man sitting at his sofa

-Shiroyama…what do you want?-  
-I have a question for you-  
-Better be quick, I have no time for you-  
-Can I go to your corp tomorrow?-  
-What?-

Yuu stood up and walked towards the businessman. Takashima stepped back, getting away from Yuu like he had some kind of horrible disease

-Don’t answer me with another question. Can I go or not?-  
-Didn’t your school start tomorrow?-  
-You’re still answering me with questions-  
-Do what you want, if you want to go…I can’t stop you. But I’m not going to give you a stupid tour or babysit you all day long, I have things to do…I’m a busy man not a babysitter-

The raven haired sighed

-Thanks-  
-Why are you so curious about the corporation?-  
-Nothing really…just that…being curious-

Takashima walked right by him, getting lost in the huge darkness of the house. Yuu looked at his back like it was the most interesting thing in this world…they didn’t said a word to each other in the few hours left of the night.

 

The next day, Yuu woke up early. The sky lacking the typical orange color of the sunrise…he thought he would wake up before the brunette but he was wrong. On the table, few leftovers of a messy breakfast were left behind.

He decided to take the bus to the corporation…the stop was just a few blocks away from the big house. The road there was boring and silent and the great crystal building with green and black letters displaying “Hellion” made him feel a lot better…at least the boring road was over.

On the entrance, he was immediately smothered by a security guard who filled him with, among other things, questions about his name, the reason of his visit and who he was searching for. So Takashima trusted no one…the security at his front door was on a presidential level.

Fifteen minutes after dealing with the guard, he thought about giving up and walk away maybe go home and have a good talk with Midori…Takashima definitely had something to do with this whole “You-shall-not-pass” incident.

-Shiroyama?-

A voice, a whole lot different from Takashima, greeted him. Yuu looked in the direction of the sound and found the younger brother of the CEO…Yutaka was his name if he remembered right. He was shining on his suit just like the day of the auction and walked with a expression full of himself…just like his older brother

-What’s wrong Sosuke? Is there a problem with this kid?-

The guard looked at Yutaka

-Sir, this kid says that he comes to make a visit under the orders of Mr. Takashima but he hasn’t show me an ID neither told me where he comes from. Besides, Mr. Takashima never leaved me orders of “a kid making a visit”-

Yutaka sighed and he made a few signs with his hand

-Don’t worry Sosuke, I can handle this. He is an employee of my brother and his name is Yuu Shiroyama. Every time he comes to this corporation, you have my order to let him come in ok? Even if he doesn’t have an ID-

The guard made a deep bow first in the direction of Yutaka and then in front of Yuu. The vicepresident walked to a nearby elevator, calling Yuu to follow him

-Thank you for helping me out there Yutaka-

Yuu spoke with a gentle voice while his partner pressed buttons on the elevator. Looking at him from that distance he could see that he and Takashima had nothing, absolutely nothing alike…even the color of their hair seemed different, a little bit clearer than Takashima.

-It’s okay Yuu…I was just trying to solve my bro mistake. That idiot forgot to give you a pass or at least say something to the guard. He can really be a bastard sometimes…-

_You don’t say…_

The elevator kept showing numbers on the little screen at the top of the door. Yuu was curious to where they were going.

-By the way, I never presented myself properly- Yutaka made a bow –My name is Tanabe Yutaka, nice to meet you-  
-Tanabe?- Yuu cocked his head to the side but then made a bow too  
-Yeah well, I rather use my mom last name since I don’t want to get confused. Kouyou really deserves his position as a CEO you know? I don’t want to steal his place-

The younger man seized his opportunity to share his opinions

-Confuse you? Come on dude…you are a complete different version of a Takashima-

Yutaka laughed out loud and Yuu had to say something: his smile was the most beautiful thing he saw on the day. It felt like he could light up the whole building just with that smile.

-Well…everybody tells me that I look a lot more like my mom. You see it when you meet her, it’s going to be crazy-

The elevator finally stopped in some unknown floor. Yuu could see it was full of machinery and an incomplete skeleton of a car…so this was the building department.

-Well Yuu. What do you think if we start our tour from here? The underground of the corporation-

Underground?! Yuu was completely sure that the elevator was going up…however  he let out a short laugh at the “tour” part. Definitely Yutaka was a very weird Takashima

-So you’re giving me a tour-  
-Of course! It’s going to be fun, I swear. After that you can see the meanie of my brother-

And so the youngest Takashima showed the whole corporation to Yuu: From the colossal underground where all the magic of those beauties was made to the smaller departments filled with blue prints, sketches and ideas. There were four big meeting rooms each and every one of them with a different purpose. The design of all rooms was futuristic and in grey tones…everything was so elegant and exquisite that Yuu was afraid of touching something.

Yutaka showed him his office and Yuu had to say that the whole thing looked a lot more like a teenager room than the vicepresident office. The whole furniture was a luxury, the design was meant to be serious but…the walls were covered with movies and videogames posters, he also had a shelf full of Dragon Ball collectibles…

They finally stopped in front of Takashima office.

-This is where our tour ends Yuu…it’s my brother office-  
-Thank you very much Yutaka, without you I would still be lost. Hell, I wouldn’t have entered-

Yutaka smiled and placed his hands on Yuu shoulders, patting him a bit

-Don’t worry. When you need anything I’ll help you-

The raven haired nodded and entered the office. However inside the office, the successful Takashima was gone and an old lady was trying to clean one of the shelfs in the office

That woman is surely Midori mother

The woman looked at him as soon has he entered, her tired eyes and her shaky hands…Yuu acted out of pure instinct and started helping her clean with a rag on his hands

-Oh boy…you don’t have to help me. I’m doing this for years  
-Don’t worry ma’am. Your daughter talked a lot about you. I know you work hard everyday so you must be quick before Takashima arrives-

-It’s MR TAKASHIMA, son-  
-Whatever…he still the same idiot-

The old lady rubbed her wrist and back trying to ease the pain on her joints. She was 67 and her rhythm was slow but…she had no options. Some objects were covered in dust and they were on a higher shelf. Yuu never saw those objects so he only helped the woman with the lower objects.

The office door opened again and this time, it was Takashima

Yuu would never forget the expression of fury…pure rage when he saw him

Maybe his hate was toward the old lady

-What are you doing Shiroyama?  
-Eh? I’m just trying to help this lady to clea-

He was interrupted by the strong voice of Takashima

-That’s her job, not yours. Let her finish-  
-Come on Takashima, give her a break. At this age it’s tough to do this-  
-Let. Her. Finish-

The old lady was shaking like a leaf and Yuu could only see her with sympathetic eyes. The business man sat at his desk and Yuu kept looking at the lady. She finished cleaning so she made a bow and then walked towards the door

-Hey- said Takashima –You missed the upper part. Clean it up-  
-I’m sorry Mr. Takashima, I can’t reach-  
-I didn’t say if you reach it or not. I said clean it up-

Takashima stood up and got closer and closer to the lady and the shelf when he saw she was doing nothing. Yuu was ready to strike a punch right in that bastard face

-What are you waiting?-  
-I can’t reach sir-  
-Do it-  
-Sir…please- the woman started crying –Don’t do this…I can’t reach…please-  
-Do it!-  
-Sir! Please!-

Yuu couldn’t believe it

Takashima grasped the wrist of the old lady in his hand and raised it above her head, Yuu could hear something crack here and there and he was ready to kick Kouyou ass if he ever tried to hurt this woman

-Don’t cry! Isn’t this your job?!-  
-Takashima…  
-Shut up Shiroyama! Answer me woman!-  
-Yes sir!-  
-Then you do it and stop playing the fucking victim! Get the fuck out of my office and I don’t want to see you in the rest of the week. If we ever met on the corridors…I swear it woman, I'll make your life a living hell-

The poor old lady tried to get out of there as fast has she could, sobbing and moaning in the middle of tears. Takashima sat behind his desk once more and Yuu clenched his fist in rage…

-Why did you come Shiroyama?-  
-How…could you?-  
-Oh, so you’re just going to mess around. Get the fuck out of my office too-  
-You’re not going to treat me like that!-

Takashima punched his desk with fury and yet again, stood up

-She is just an old lady!- Yuu continued –She is tired! What do you want her to do?!-  
-It’s not about the fucking shelf! She is the cleaning lady! Her brain could only afford to clean so I treat her like that! To me she has no face…she is a mop, she is a broom, she is an old fucking rag. She has a duty and she must do it everyday!-

Once more, the business man sat on his throne. Yuu lowered his gaze

-The rumors were true- The raven haired whispered  
-What rumors?-  
-That you’re cruel with you employees…that you treat them like slaves…that you were selfish, arrogant and cruel…I always thought those things were said by your enemies, something to make you seem like an idiot…but now I know it’s true…everything it’s true-

Yuu raised his gaze and his dark eyes clashed with Takashima honey colored orbs full of hate…so much hate that it was making Yuu uneasy

-They were right!- Yuu screamed –You’re an arrogant, selfish, cold piece of shit! That’s why you’re always alone! Even your brother is away! Because you’re a disgusting human being! I hope…I hope your enterprise falls bankrupt and the cleaning lady would make your life a living hell!-

Takashima remained quiet

-I hope nobody loves you! I hope you’re always alone!-

Yuu turned around and got out of the office. Takashima was left looking at a blank space on his paperwork. Searching for some hope and something beautiful in his family photograph when her mother turned 50

_“Nobody it’s going to love you”_

Kouyou opened his eyes wide open when he heard that voice inside his mind, he gasped and covered his face with only one hand. That voice…it’s been so long since the last time he heard it

His whole body started shaking full of fear, his head never stopped spinning and he could hear his pulse inside his ears, his breath uneven, trying to hold his screams by biting his lips with force. Why? They told him that voice would never get back…

_“Uru…you’re a very, very dirty boy”_

-Leave me alone…- he whispered in a broken voice, he tried to hold onto something but failed miserably and fell to the floor knocking out papers and his family photo. He was going to die…he was suffering the worst panic attack he had in years

Between his despair, he managed to reach his phone and immediately dialed Yutaka number

_______________________

Yuu was crazy mad when he reached the reception lobby. Fortunately, Yutaka was there and at least he would help him with that stupid guy

-Hey…I just left you in the office. You’re going so fast?- Yutaka said with a frown  
-Yes! Your brother it’s an asshole!-  
-Eh?-

The sound of Yutaka phone interrupted them

-Yutaka speaking... Eh? What’s wrong?-

A long silence

-No, no, no, no, no. Don’t do anything ok? I’ll go there in a minute. Hang on!-

The younger Takashima ran at the stairs, the elevator was busy right now with another people and waiting for it will take away precious time

Yuu imagined the worst

-The cleaning lady!-

He ran behind the vicepresident, following close. But Yutaka took a very familiar turn in one of the higher floors…he just came out of there...it was the corridor for…Takashima office. The door opened with a bang and closed in the same motion. Walking carefully, he opened the door slightly to see inside.

Takashima was on the floor, covering his mouth while long tears crossed his cheeks. There were a bunch of papers all over the floor alongside broken pieces of glass. Yutaka tried to calm him down

-Kouyou! What’s wrong?! What happened?!-  
-She…she is back…she…-

His voice was so fragile that Yuu felt the lump in his throat

-No Kouyou she is not here. Look at me, it’s me Yutaka…everything it’s going to be fine-

Seeing that man so broken, shaking like a kid full of fear…Yuu felt his own tears stinging at his eyes

_What did I just do?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, Kouyou it's an asshole but he has a reason
> 
> Thank you very much for reading!


	5. The Guardian

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the middle of the darkness, Yuu realizes Takashima is chained to a horrible past

It’s been two months…

…since Shiroyama said all those words in front of Takashima and the bond between them completely broke, possibly, beyond repair.

-This is the actual sketch for the Hellion III, Mr. Yutaka. The blueprints for the actual model are already in the production department however we wanted to make a new design…you know, for future models where we could add all those things we can’t put in this one-

The chief of the design department sat in front of Yutaka and Kouyou on the smallest meeting room. He was a young man, maybe between his 20’s and 30’s. His extremely short hair and his tight suit made him look like any man on a wedding or school festival. He showed his latest idea to the vice-president, some kind of expansion to the original. Yutaka looked at the blueprints with a smile and talked vividly with the young man about the details.

Kouyou stopped paying attention a long time ago. He was tired…he had a bunch of fatigue and his body was screaming ‘rest’. In this two months he barely slept a few hours each day, he lost some weight as shown by his oversized suit which used to fit him so well. The panic attacks became more frequent and every little thing triggered them or leaved him in tears.

This kind of life just wasn’t right. It wasn’t fair for his body, for his employees who looked at him like a role model and waited for him day after day and of course this wasn’t fair to his family. Everyone worried about him and all this worry made him feel like a sick and useless man

_“Uruha…come with me to my office”_

Again that voice…that feminine voice he feared so much and just by remembering the tone he was shaking and feeling like a kid again. He closed his eyes and, under his breath, mumbled a soft “Not now, please”. He would sacrifice everything in order to not worry Yutaka yet again and stop being a burden to him…he was going through enough shit just for him

When he opened his eyes, he wasn’t in the meeting room anymore but in a garden…behind a huge tree that slowly disposed his leaves with the soft breeze. In the distance he could see a short kid sitting on a concrete bench, his feet dangling and not touching the floor, rocking himself back and forth while he hugged tightly a light blue colored teddy bear. He surely was around five or six years old and looked so…innocent.

His face couldn’t be seen but his hair was black. The rest of the garden was covered with fake grass, pink and purple flowers slowly withering on the sidelines. In front of the kid there was a three floor building made of brick and looked old with the paint falling off. A tall, concrete wall covered the outside world from sight.

_“Uruha. Didn’t you hear me, blockhead? Come over here”_

The voice turned clearer, it was so close to him. Strong steps echoed towards the kid and the boy tightened his grip on the bear. A hand suddenly popped out of nowhere and grabbed the kid by his wrist pulling him into the building

_“What did I told you about that bear?!”_

Feeling brave, Kouyou stepped towards the scene. Nobody would touch that boy

“ _Uruha! Uruha! Uruha!”_

-Hey Kouyou…-

He came back to reality when a hand touched his shoulder softly, Yutaka looked at him with eyes full of worry and the design chief showed confusion in the middle of the situation. Both gazes felt heavy on him…he never leaved the office? God, that thing felt so damn real.

-Are you okay man?-  
-Yeah…what’s wrong?-  
-I think you fell asleep a little bit, I show you the blueprints. Tohma –the employee raised his gaze, getting out of his daze –Please wait for my answer in a couple more hours ok? I have some matters to attend-   
-Pretty well Mr. Yutaka, I’m leaving Mr. Takashima-  
-Thank you Tohma…I’m sorry for falling asleep-   
-It’s okay, it happens every once in a while-

The young designer picked up the prints, walked to the door and leaved the meeting room making no noise at all

-Kou…are you really okay?-

Yutaka still looked dead worried and he stood right in front of his brother, looking face to face. Kouyou rubbed his hands and shook his head, letting out a long and frustrated sigh

-No…not at all…I’m tired-  
-Go home and have some rest, I’ll run the office for today-   
-What the hell are you saying Yutaka? We have a project right now, this time is when I’m needed the most in this corporation, don’t you see? I’m needed and I can’t leave my employees like they were disposable objects…I’m the boss and I should act like it-

The younger brunette crossed his arms through his chest

-Oh yeah? So you can keep sleeping at meetings?-

Kouyou frowned

-I never slept…it’s just that…I started to remember that day-   
-That day?- Yutaka voice got gentler  
-Yeah-  
-Oh Kouyou-

Yutaka took a step forward and hugged his brother in the most comfortable position. Kouyou flinched and gasped at the touch, feeling scared but then, almost immediately, slipped his hands through Yutaka waist, hugging him back. This kind of moments where very common when they were kids but they started to grow and the contact became less frequent. The fact that Yutaka was hugging him, warmed Kouyou heart to a letal point. It showed him he wasn’t alone. His little brother was an idiot…with a big, golden and beautiful heart.

Kouyou kept hugging him for minutes after

-Go and have some rest. You need it-  
-I’ll call mom-  
-Do whatever you need and don’t worry for this work all right? I’ll take care of it, that’s what the vice-president is for isn’t? I’ll do my work-

The brunette said nothing…he just lost himself in the hug, breathing his brother scent until he felt relaxed

_______________________________________________________________

Kouyou was at his mother home. She sat at the main couch on the living room of her house and his older son laid his head on her lap. Combing her fingers through his dark locks in an attempt to calm him down and make him feel safe.

-Oh baby- the woman whispered when she saw her son face –Are you taking your meds?-  
-I stopped taking them a week ago…they’re useless-  
-Kouyou-

The man sighed

-You don’t get it mom…- he felt a bit restless –Those things help me at night, they put me to sleep but…they don’t take away the nightmares and much less those…times at the day…sometimes I daydream. I see the garden, the building even the tree…I see her hand on top of mine…it’s disgusting…the pills don’t take away those things-

There was a long pause. The woman kept combing his hair

-Love…let me tell you something, as your mom-

Kouyou raised his head so he could look her at her eyes. The woman placed her hands on his son cheeks

-I will be there with you as long as you need me…always. And because of that I’m begging you to get back to therapy, when you abandoned it last time this happened. You still can’t get over that and…-

The business looked away

-No mom…I’m not going back to therapy-   
-Why?-  
-I don’t want to find my demons again…you, dad, Yutaka…everyone worked so hard to take me away from darkness, to help me fall in love with life again, trust people and trust myself…I don’t want to be that kid again mom…I really don’t want it-  
-Why you hate that kid so much?-

Kouyou was left in silence, he fell back on his mother lap. Longing to sleep a few hours before night, when the nightmares were too much and ripped his heart apart.

_________________________________________

-I swear it…I saw him crying and he had this big fear on his eyes. It looked like he was scared of Yutaka. I’ve never thought that idiot was human-

Yuu spoke to Takanori on the phone for the tenth time in this two months. One day after the messy reunion in Takashima office, Yuu found out that Takanori filled his cellphone with worried calls and messages that read “Where are you?” or “Yuu please answer me”. Yuu was happy to hear his voice…it felt refreshing

-Mhm I see…- Takanori deep voice made a little echo in his ears –I think I have a small idea of what’s wrong with Mr. Untouchable-

Yuu rolled his eyes at the new nickname

-What is it Taka?-  
-I’m not a psychologist but…Takashima definitely suffered a panic attack. It happens sometimes when you get really stressed but…-  
-But what Taka? Quit the drama-   
-Sometimes it’s triggered by a traumatic situation. The person revives the angst and pain through flashbacks and…that happens-

Yuu fell silent when he heard the alternative option, it definitely was a long time since Takanori got restless

-Yuu? Are you there?-  
-Yeah Taka-  
-You sound shocked-  
-I’m only curious…if it was because of stress then everything is fine but…-  
-But?-  
-I think Takashima lived something in his past, something really ugly. Something made him hate so much…you should have seen his gaze that day…it turned the whole room into ice you know? The hate and the fury…he looked ready to kill-

Silence once more

-He better not touch you or I’ll rip his throat with my bare hands-   
-Easy there Ted Bundy-  
-I’m serious Yuu…I’m worried about you and more now that I know you have a lunatic at home-  
-He is not a lunatic Taka…he just…has some issues-   
-Whatever. Don’t mess around with things ok Yuu? Keep your fucking nose out of Takashima’s darkness before it reaches you-

Yuu thought deeply about Takanori words even hours after the call

That day, late at night, Yuu wrote quickly on his notebook trying to finish his homework before midnight. He had to make sure every single detail was in his place, the teacher was a perfectionist freak and every mistake counted by three. He wanted to talk with the businessman right now and decided to kill time with his work.

He heard him open the door with his keys then dropping them on the nearest table, close the door with ease and walk to an unknown point. According to Midori, Takashima had an office in the far side of the house: so well hidden that the newcomers usually got lost. It was made to give him more privacy. Yuu got out of his room at light speed, wanting to reach him before he closed the door to his shrine, this was a perfect opportunity to talk.

He wanted to apologize for all the hurting words…maybe Takanori was right about the traumatic situation and if that was the case, Yuu felt extra guilty. He never _never_ wanted to hurt him, not to this point. He was mad because of his attitude towards the old lady but…it just wasn’t right

Yuu spent thirty minutes searching for the so called ‘office’, opening door after door until he finally made it. He thought it was empty since no sound came from it but, when he opened the door, he found Takashima sitting behind a big wood desk, behind him there was a bookshelf full of all kind of books, pamphlets and collections. There was a laptop on top of it and some photographs. The light from the moon illuminated the whole room.

It was a cold and lonely place, just like his owner

Yuu knocked on the door a few times

-Takashima?

He raised his gaze and Yuu felt he woke the beast, looking at the eyes of a snake

-Shiroyama, what do you need? I’m busy-  
-I’m not going to take a lot of your time…I just want to talk with you-

He closed the laptop and turned a lamp on top of the desk, Yuu never saw it before because the darkness covered everything. The lamp covered a lot of the desk surface but barely showed Takashima face

-What is it?-  
-About what happened two months ago…I’m sorry…I…I…never wanted to treat you that way-   
-You’re sorry?- he chuckled –I don’t believe in apologies Shiroyama, if you were going to be ‘sorry’ then you shouldn’t have done it in the first place-

Yuu sighed and closed his eyes, trying to get deeper into the office. The smell of books filled his senses and he felt relaxed, ready for everything

-I couldn’t stand your attitude Takashima. That isn’t the way to treat an employee and much less a woman…I’m completely sure your mother never teached you those hateful words-

Silence. Takashima looked at his laptop and shook his head a couple of times

-No- he broke the silence –My mother only teached me good things, respect…respect above everything else. She never did anything wrong with my education-

Yuu decided to stay silent, letting the man to slowly open the door to his dark interior.

-But…all the things I said to the old lady are completely mine. That…thing deserves no respect from anybody, you understand?-  
-Takashima…what the hell are you talking about? She is just an old lady!-  
-No! She is my employee!-

Takashima stood up. Yuu stepped back until he felt the door clash with his back and he frantically searched for the knob. If things got too ugly or if the businessman started to turn violent he would escape. Even if he could see absolutely nothing in the dark

-Then you should treat her better!-  
-I can do whatever I want with her! I’m her boss and I can humillate her and hurt her in whatever way I please!-

Yuu gasped…this man was so full of hate for the poor people and he almost felt exposed. So this is the way people turned when they had money? Why Takanori never acted like this?

-What did that woman do to you Takashima?-

And the question was thrown to the air like a coin. The raven haired could see the way Takashima expression changed, the darkness of the room couldn’t hide the shock on his face

-Leave me alone Shiroyama-  
-That’s why you had that panic attack on your office didn’t you? It was that woman-

_Keep your fucking nose out of Takashima’s darkness Yuu_

-Get the fuck out of my office Shiroyama, now- Takashima hissed full of anger –You can break the fucking contract any goddamn time you want…I’ll give all the fucking money of the world to that blond midget you love so much if that means you’ll leave me forever alone…get out-

Yuu didn’t need any more words, he turned the knob and leaved the office in a hurry. His failed apology bouncing on the empty walls of the office

__________________________________________________

 _-What did I told you about that stupid bear?!-_  
-I’m sorry ma’am!-   
-What did I told you Uruha?!-  
-That it’s for kids and I’m no longer a kid!-  
-I’ll show you the bad way of not being a kid!- 

_The wrist of the child cracked under the vice-like grip of the older woman. Her body covered in a long black dress, her dark locks falling all over her back and her high heels clacking on the wood floor while she pulled the kid through a corridor_

_The boy whined and cried_

_-Please ma’am let me go…I’m not gonna sleep with the teddy anymore!-  
-No! There’s no escape from this one young man!- _

_He was scared…_

_The next thing he recalls is himself falling on the floor on his hands and knees and the sound of leather clash with something_

Kouyou woke up screaming on his bed, a thick layer of cold sweat all over his body and tears flowing freely through his cheeks. He raised a hand to his mouth trying to prevent the sobs from leaving while he searched for some kind of protection…those stupid nightmares, those fragile memories that broke his heart…

He was scared

His pulse sounded in his ears and he grasped the sheets with strength

The door of his room slowly opened and this only raised his anxiety to horrible levels. A figure came out of the darkness but it wasn’t scary…in fact, it was Shiroyama with the most worried expression he saw in his life. The moonlight filtered through the windows and, thanks to that, they could see each other yet again.

-I heard the scream…Takashima…are you…?-

He took some steps forward towards the bed, his hand looked like the claw of a demon and Takashima shook his head frantically

-Don’t…don’t touch me-  
-I’m Shiroyama-  
-I know…I know but…don’t touch me…not know…please-

Takashima breath got slower with time while Yuu looked full of doubt and worry, feeling useless while he crumbled in the middle of fear

Yuu sat on the edge of the bed

-Sleep Takashima-  
-What..?-  
-Come on, sleep all you want. I’ll promise I won’t move from here, not a single second…if that makes you feel better and keeps away whatever it’s making you stay awake then…go on-

The businessman looked at him for a while. Yuu only smiled gently and made a gesture towards the bed, hurrying him to sleep

-Takanori used to do this when I was a kid…-

The smile grew bigger. Takashima got into a comfortable position and tucked himself under the sheets still looking at the raven haired boy

-I was scared of my closet door- he chuckled –Taka would bring a chair from the dining room and sit in front of the door, he would cross his arms and tell me “I’m not moving from here until you fall asleep”. That helped me sleep…a lot, it made me feel safe-

Takashima felt his chest swell with nostalgia, he immediately made a connection between them. A smile crossed his face

-My parents and Yutaka did the exact same thing- he whispered, Yuu nodded trying to tell him to go on –I’ll always have nightmares so Yutaka would share his ‘blankie’ and let me sleep with him…my parents did the same. And you’re right…it made me feel safe-

Yuu shrugged

-You see? Now go to sleep…I’m not going to sleep anyways, I have a lot of damn homework-

Takashima nodded and closed his eyes

Yuu thought he felt asleep because of the silence. This definitely was going to be a long night resting on an uncomfortable position

-Yuu-

The boy looked at the businessman, he had his eyes closed but it seemed he was listening. He dropped the “Shiroyama” nickname

-Thank you-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This time i actually posted the chapter fast...because I'm lazy with my homework and because Shikkoku gave me so much Gazefeels 
> 
> Kouyou past is going to be revealed soon but meanwhile, make some speculations 
> 
> Thank you very much for reading!


	6. Fragile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuu is determined to pull Takashima out of darkness...even if he can't see a thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING:  
> Descriptions of abuse ahead

Yuu woke up the next day in the empty room of Takashima, a blanket wrapped around his slim form and a pillow under his head. Even when he was lying on an uncomfortable position, he felt warm and cozy.

The sun filled the room little by little, its rays shining close to the raven face. The small rounded clock ticked slowly, showing the first hours of the morning. There was no water running anywhere, there was no sound of someone on the kitchen…he was completely alone in the big, expensive house. Unfortunately, his classes had already ended by now…so he slept past mid-day.

Takashima room looked rather simple. His bed was twice the average size, the walls painted grey, white curtains, a good amount of books in a shelf right at the corner, a night table beside his bed and a small LED screen in front of the bed. Nothing out of the ordinary. Yuu got up and walked around the small place, trying to look for something interesting.

All that he found was some frames on top of the night table.

In one of them, Takashima sat beside an older woman with a birthday cake in front of her, he was hugging her while he kissed her cheek. Yutaka sat on the opposite side doing the exact same thing. They both looked so happy and Yuu had a hard time thinking about it…he couldn’t believe this was the usual Takashima.

The other photo had a woman and a man holding a kid with a party hat. The adults were smiling while the kid looked to be laughing hysterically. So…the businessman kept his memories on a deep, private space of his life. Maybe that’s why he looked so cold and selfish on the outside, he didn’t want to show any weakness. The younger man decided it was enough sneaking, he folded the blanket and placed the pillow on the correct side of the bed. After that, he walked outside the room and then outside the house…

Yuu arrived to Toxic half an hour after he left Takashima mansion.

He knocked the door a few times, waiting for someone to answer. Minutes gone by and he started to get worried…the door finally opened a bit.

-We’re closed bud, come after six o’clock-  
-It’s me Taka, Yuu-

Takanori immediately shot the door open and Yuu smiled, running towards the man and tackling him to the ground in a big bear hug. Takanori could care less about the fall, he hugged the younger back with the same strength. They both laughed out loud at their unusual way of greeting. The laughter soon died and they remained in the floor, still hugging.

-I missed you- Takanori said in a soft voice, tightening the hug  
-I missed you too- Yuu answered in an equal tone, hiding his face in the crook of the older man neck –It’s been such a long time…-  
-I think I should get going?-

Yuu smiled at Takanori reference to the Boston song and then broke the hug. Getting up the ground and dusting off his clothes. Takanori remained on the floor, sitting with crossed legs.

-What are you doing here Yuu? Don’t you have school?-  
-Well…yeah but…I missed my classes-  
-Oh…you just missed them?- Takanori raised an eyebrow in an inquisitive way  
-I fell asleep…I mean. Takashima had some troubles sleeping yesterday and I…-

Yuu couldn’t finish his sentence when Takanori got up and raised his voice

-Takashima had troubles sleeping? And why did you care? I mean…it’s your school at least he should know that and…what the hell did he need anyway?!-

Silence filled the room

-Can we forget about that? I wanted to see you…to talk to you in person. It’s been such a long time and no! You shouldn’t get going! I…I really wanted to hug you Taka. I’ve never been this far from you in my whole life…-

The older man sighed and walked towards the raven, hugging him one more time and this time rubbing slow circles on his back.

-It’s okay…I just overreacted. Let’s go and drink something all right? Maybe you could tell me about Takashima and his stuff and maybe about your grades and your friends. Okay? Just don’t look sad…you look prettier with a smile-

Yuu laughed softly and broke the hug yet again. Smiling

Takanori went to the kitchen to make some coffee and a bunch of chocolate-flavored pancakes while Yuu waited for him on the dining table, thinking about last night and Takashima broken form crying in the night…scared…feeling restless in the darkness of his own room.

-Yuu?-  
-Yeah?-  
-You drifted off. Everything okay?-  
-I was just thinking about Takashima and what I saw last night. Let me explain: I was doing my homework late at night when I suddenly heard a muffled scream. I knew it came from Takashima room because there was no one else there…I ran all the way to his room and found him shaking, with dry tears on his cheeks and seeking for some kind of support on the sheets…he said he had a nightmare and he couldn’t sleep so I decided to stay with him and…-

Takanori interrupted, completing the sentence

-And you watched him sleep…like I did to you-  
-Yeah. But! But I know that worked! I mean…it worked for me when I was a kid. He must have felt safe or something because he felt asleep in quite a few minutes. I stayed awake until three in the morning and well, the rest is history-

The older man just sighed and sat on a chair beside Yuu, placing a small tray with the coffee and pancakes on top of the table.

-Look Yuu. I’m gonna tell you something real quick for the second time in a few hours: Stay the fuck out of Takashima darkness. That guy is into some deep shit Yuu…I mean it. Someone hurt him a lot on the past, someone or something or…I don’t fucking know okay?! Just keep yourself away-

Yuu looked at his father figure with a disgusted look on his face

-What if it was me?-  
-Huh?-  
-What if I was the one with the nightmares, the panic attacks and the screams? Would you keep yourself out of my “darkness” Taka?-

The blond man was speechless

-Of course not…but that’s because you’re really special to me…is Takashima anything special to you? I think not-  
-How are you so sure?-

Takanori felt heartbroken

-He is isn’t he?- said the older –He is special to you now…-  
-No…but I’m a human being and he is too. I can’t watch him suffer all the time. He is a good guy Taka. He is not arrogant…he is just defensive. He loves his brother and his family with all his heart…he is just…helpless right now…-

Silence fell between them once more and this time nobody tried to break it. Yuu and Takanori had breakfast in complete silence and after a while of cold stares and awkward situations, Yuu decided to left Toxic once more  

-When will I see you again?- said Takanori, back to his soft tone  
-I don’t know…maybe in a few more months-  
-Months?-  
-It’s not only Takashima and you know it. School is a bitch most of the time so…maybe on the summer break-

The older man lowered his gaze, trying to not look weak in front of Yuu. He felt a pair of arms closing around his waist. This time he didn’t want to hug him

-See you Taka, take care-

And then he left…Takanori remained in that position letting the tears flow down his cheeks

________________________________________________________________

Yuu texted some of his friends in the evening (after watching at least four episodes of his favorite T.V. show and then playing for a few hours on his PSP) to check if he had any kind of homework for tomorrow. The clock with the shape of Tottoro read only ten o’clock…still early and a great time to start his duties.

He turned his laptop on and waited for everything to start running. After quite a few minutes he finally managed to play his favorite music. Boston “Long Time” softly playing in the background as a fond memory of Takanori reference earlier. He started typing on his keyboard, making a quick sketch of the essay he had to show tomorrow. Man…this surely was a long night and he hoped Takashima could have a good night sleep this time.

Hours passed by

The clock read 12:30 P.M.

And then Yuu heard a calm knock on his door.

He jumped out of his seat and almost knocked off everything on top of his desk. He kept his cool and walked slowly to his door, like he was in some kind of horror movie. Opening the door just a bit, he saw Takashima standing outside with his arms crossed.

He finally opened the whole thing

-Takashima…what are you doing here? You almost gave me a heart attack-  
-Sorry. Are you busy? I want to talk with you-

Yuu looked back at his open laptop with the Word document still blank.

-Nah. I’m okay. Come in, the corridor isn’t a nice place to talk about stuff-

Takashima stepped inside, giving a quick look at the room and then at the laptop screen. He smiled softly when he heard the song and saw the document not even with Yuu name on it.

-An essay huh?- he said. Yuu made a scowl  
-Yeah. It sucks right? In fact it’s my homework but anyways…I don’t even know how to write-

The older man smiled yet again and he sat on the edge of the bed. Yuu quickly claimed his chair near his desk and an awkward silence formed between them

-So…what is it?-

Nothing came out. The awkwardness still dancing with both of them.

Suddenly, his deep and calm voice filled the almost empty room

-I want you to know…the reason behind the nightmares and…my asshole attitude towards the old lady at the corporation-

If the raven wasn’t paying attention before, he was now. He felt nervous…what kind of things he would hear about? Death, murder, poverty? His head started spinning and he tried to control himself quickly. He would open his heart to Takashima words this night.

-I’m all ears Takashima…I won’t judge you-

The older man took a deep breath, waited for a couple of minutes and then started speaking. His gaze was lost to an unknown point in the floor, his hands nervously fondling with each other, his voice hoarse and dry

-I…I was pretty much a normal kid until my sixth birthday. Had a normal family with caring parents who loved each other and loved me. One day, my dad screwed up at his job and he got fired…he couldn’t find a job after that…maybe it was his luck or the fact that he never finished the middle school…I would never know. He went crazy one night…shot my mom in the head and then turned the gun on himself-

Yuu covered his mouth with one of his hands completely shocked. Takashima voice drifted a bit, silence filled the room for the god-knows time and the raven haired moved his chair a little closer to him.

-I was playing with my neighbor when that happened…that’s why he didn’t kill me. I came home to find my dad in a pool of blood, his back against the wall and my mom…she had a portion of her eye missing with a huge hole on the back of her head…blood everywhere…in the walls, the sofa, the floor…everywhere…I…-

His voice cracked. Yuu felt a lump on his throat, he wanted to stand up and hug the poor man. He was only six years old at the time for god sake…he was supposed to laugh and play not scream and cry

-The neighbors called the police. Nobody wanted to take care of me, not even my own relatives so I was sent to an orphanage-

The younger man found this to be the best moment to interrupt

-That’s where you found Yutaka family…-  
-Yes…yes I found them there…but that’s my happy ending…the middle is…is…much, much more ugly than just that…-

Another deep breath, he rubbed his hands together and then on his face

-I was so scared to be there. It was a nasty, filthy place with no love coming from anyone. Everyone treated you like you were an useless piece of shit. I couldn’t sleep at night…the nightmares of my mom and my dad corpses just wouldn’t let me sleep. I woke up screaming, hugging a little blue bear I brought from home…the head chief from the orphanage found out about my teddy…said I couldn’t keep it anymore because I wasn’t a kid…maybe I held onto that teddy because it was the only thing I had left from my family…I just couldn’t let him go. She took it away from me…placing it somewhere inside her office-

The raven haired fought against the tears in his eyes

-One of the older kids helped me some day and I had my teddy back…-

Yuu immediately felt something bad was coming just because of that comment

-She found out and dragged me all the way to her office…that’s where my life broke completely…she…she beat me with a cane on my back until I couldn’t even feel the pain anymore…then she…she…-

Yuu started crying, unable to hold back

-She raped me…she surely used the cane…I…I don’t know…but…but…I still have the pain in my mind. It…it hurt and I…-

His voice cracked one more time and this time he started crying, his hands went flying to his mouth, the sobs distorting his voice and shaking his body like it was some kind of invisible force.

-It’s still in my mind…that day will never get out of me no matter how much I live…She would say I was a very dirty boy and that nobody would love me because of that…because I was filthy-

Yuu couldn’t find the right words for this moment. He was horrified…he never expected this kind of past for a man such as Takashima…he also never expected that kind of cruelty in a human being. Oh god…he was just a kid, just a little kid with a broken mind…and that woman destroyed his life with her bare hands.

-She continued with the abuse and the rapes day by day until I reached a point I didn’t care anymore…I became her own personal freak show you know? She would place the teddy on a high shelf and made me jump for it…if I couldn’t reach it she would beat me with the cane or rape me…it all came how she was feeling that day…because of that I’m so scared of being touched…-

He furiously wiped at his eyes, not wanting to look weak. Everything started to make sense to Yuu. He quickly remembered that day with the panic attack at the office and how he was so scared of Yutaka touch. That day when Takanori placed a hand on his chest and he gasped so loud everyone thought he was about to scream.

-Yutaka family came three days after my tenth birthday and they became a current visit. Three weeks after, without even thinking about it, they adopted me. Maybe it was because Yutaka became very close to me…always asking questions about what I liked and what I hated, constantly talking about baseball and his favorite players even when I never answered a single thing…-

A smile appeared on his face at the memory

-They gave me everything I lost when I reached the orphanage…I had a comfortable bed, clean clothes, warm food…a dad to play ball with me in the backyard…a mom to hug me and tell me bed time stories...even a noisy but beautifully gentle brother. They helped me fall in love with life again, they waited for me day after day until I started to open up and trusted them enough to tell them all the shit I’m telling you today. After that, they changed my name from “Uruha” to “Kouyou” so it was harder for the people of the orphanage to find me. My last name isn’t Takashima either…that’s my adoptive mom last name, I decided to use it when I reached the CEO position at Hellion. Legally, I’m called Kouyou Tanabe-

He sniffed loudly and, yet again, wiped his tears

-My parents brought me to therapy. I learned to deal with the pain, the nightmares and the fear…it really helped me but…but I never ended the treatment. It was a mistake I know but…but I never felt comfortable around my therapist, especially because she was a woman and she would never allow my parents or Yutaka to be there with me in every session. I never fully trusted her even when she was really, really gentle with me-

Yuu took a deep breath and looked at the ground. He felt so bad right now…he had his heart broken by a cruel and cold story.

-My adoptive dad died when I turned 25 and he passed Hellion on to me. As soon as I had power I promised myself I would find that woman… -

His voice lost all the sadness, sorrow and hurt and slowly started filling with rage, hate, pain…

-I promised myself to break her so much she couldn’t even look at her reflection without feeling sick or nauseated. Rip away her will, hurt her family and drive them all to the depths of hell, destroy her in every single fucking way I could imagine…that turned into my obsession. Yutaka and my mom never knew about it but I started spending money on detectives so they could find her. I didn’t want her in jail, that was a really good faith for pieces of shit like her-

The tears disappeared out of his face. Yuu felt scared around the Takashima that surfaced out of nowhere

-I found her when I turned 28 and so…she became the old cleaning lady-

Yuu gasped loudly and he fumbled with his words

-Oh my god…so…the…she was…all this time?-  
-Yes. She is that woman…-  
-Oh god…and I was defending her all this time…oh god…oh god…-  
-It’s okay Yuu…you didn’t know anything about this. It’s not your fault-

They turned silent for a long, long time

Yuu got up from his seat and walked towards Takashima, standing right in front of him. The older man felt restless, he could see it in his facial expression even if it was dark enough.

-Can I hug you…Kouyou?-

Takashima looked down

-Yes but…please…don’t feel offended if I flinch or anything. It’s just a…natural reflex. It happens every time someone tries to touch me-

Yuu shook his head and then circled his hand through his waist. In fact, the older man flinched and tried to get away from the hold. After a few moments, he remained calm but not answering the contact

-Why did you tell me all of this Kouyou?-

Takashima didn’t even care anymore about the “Kouyou” thing

-Because I trust you after last night…because I know you would never, ever try to hurt me or my family even when I’m just a stranger. If you’re going to share my life and my house for the next seven months or so, then I think it’s completely fair for you to know about what kind of…man you’re dealing with. In fact...that's why I raised my hand at the auction, because I knew that man would hurt you the same way I was and I...couldn't allow that-

Yuu remained in the hug sort of liking the way Takashima scent floated around him

-If you’re not comfortable with this Yuu then you can break the contract any minute. I’ll pay the rest of the money to Takanori-

The younger man sighed and then shook his head

-No. I’m not scared of you. I think you’re very brave for telling me all of this. I think you have such a strong heart that can deal with this pain day by day…and for that Kouyou, I want to stay with you and learn a lot more from you-

Takashima found himself hugging Yuu back and smiling softly at his words

-Thank you…it means a lot to me…-

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup...updating pretty fast because I'm on my well-deserved winter break and I decided to use that time to update this. 
> 
> Since the story is moving pretty slow, I also added two more chapters to the total (instead of 10, 12) so I can develop Yuu and Takashima relationship a bit more. Anyways...this is the longest author note ever. Thank you very much for reading!


	7. Found You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuu and Kouyou keep pulling at the red thread and soon, they found they were looking for each other.

June shone brightly in the calendar, the exact day was the 9th. Today was the birthday of the most renowned and young businessman of the moment: Takashima Kouyou.

His 30th birthday became a whole sensation in the media since early in the morning. Even some newspaper wanted his interview to publish on their front pages under a minor column. Today was the day when the oldest of the Tanabe brothers couldn’t even show his face through the window.

He received many calls and messages from business partners, other CEO, famous people who sometimes served him as models for his cars, authorities, politicians, many more. He, of course, ignored every single call only caring about two: One from his mother and the other one from his younger brother.

Yuu woke up early in the morning when he heard a lot of noise in the first floor of the house, two people argued about a space to place something (which seemed really fragile). The raven haired got dressed in comfy clothes, combed his hair a couple of times and then went out of his room to check everything.

Another two people placed flowers, presents and messages on a table. All of them for Kouyou. The older man talked on the phone and Yuu smiled, walking down the stairs while he remembered the day…damn, today was going to be busy.

-Mhm…is okay mom. Can you cook some onigiri? Yeah, maybe also Korean food…no, don’t worry about that, Yutaka knows those recipes like the back of his hand. Before I forget! Cook pasta for me will ‘ya? You know that thing just drives me crazy. Make enough of everything all right? A whole banquet ‘cause I’m bringing a guest…mhm you’ll see soon. Anyways see you later mom. Love you. Bye-

Yuu crossed his arms through his chest and ended up chuckling

-Well…you don’t see Takashima Kouyou arguing with his mom about food really often-

Kouyou smiled

-Of course, only today. Keep that in mind-   
-I can hug you right?- Yuu asked, shyness in his voice  
-Why not? I’m getting used to you right now-

Yuu walked close to him and hugged him tight. Kouyou hugged him back with the same smile on his face from minutes ago.

Since months ago, they grew closer to each other…still keeping a ‘safe’ distance but enough to be called friends. They usually shared breakfast in the mornings or a very late dinner in the midnights, when Yuu was too busy to sleep and Kouyou running from his nightmares.

Yuu also stopped calling and visiting Takanori since he was just too distracted with his homework, school projects and thousands of responsibilities. The older man never made a call after that afternoon when they talked about Kouyou being a human being and in need for help. The barrier between them grew so thick that Yuu didn’t care anymore, he stopped worrying and crying on the pillow with his phone on the side.

-Thank you for the tight hug- said Kouyou after breaking the contact  
-You know they call me the care bear-

The businessman laughed softly and Yuu felt mesmerized…even if he was a douche or a total mess, he still looked deadly beautiful.

-Do you have anything to do in the afternoon Yuu?-  
-Well, aside from a thousand essays and a million pages of homework…I think I’m okay. Why’d you ask?-   
-I want you to come home with me and eat with my family. You can bring Takanori if you want-

His expression fell and Kouyou immediately frowned, trying to solve his mistake

-Sorry…I completely forgot-  
-Don’t worry. I’ll go with you-  
-Great! It seems you don’t have school today so…what if I pick you up at 2? That’s when my and my annoying sort-of-a-brother lunch time start-

Yuu laughed at the nickname for Yutaka and then nodded with a smile, giving Kouyou a light hit on his chest with his fist.

-That’s okay for me, old man. I’ll get ready-  
-Don’t call me old man. I’m not that old…30 is still young-  
-Oh really? Damn…I wonder what ‘40’ will be. A baby?-

Another soft laugh

-Anyways Yuu…see you at 2. Please be on time-   
-Sure-

And so, the younger watched his now friend walk to the front door and lost himself in the bright light of the morning. He had all the time of the world to get ready…his stomach growled, asking for attention and some early meal. Since the house was busy with people all over the place he decided to walk a few blocks and have a little breakfast on a close café.

He spent the rest of the morning on his room, trying to finish his homework in one go without getting any distractions from his phone, singing along to his favorite songs or looking at the screenshots of his favorite T.V. show. Fortunately, he finished a great part of his homework in time so he could get ready.

Opening his closet, he picked the best looking, decent and formal clothes he could find. He ended up choosing a pair of jeans with a white V-neck, button shirt and dark boots, it wasn’t the best ‘party’ look but he definitely looked good for this kind of occasion…the first impression always mattered.

So by 1:50 P.M. Yuu was completely ready and texting his friends while sitting on the couch.

-Are you ready Yuu?-

A familiar voice said while the sound of keys echoed in the house. Yuu stood up quickly from the couch and looked at the door, Kouyou changed clothes…he now wore a dark suit with a red tie and his hair neatly combed back. He looked rather stunning and…handsome. Yuu just limited himself to smile and greet him with his hand.

-Yeah-  
-Sorry if I’ll made you wait. Let’s go, my brother and mom must be waiting-

The young man followed him close. Once again he had the chance to travel in that big, awesome spacecraft called ‘Hellion’ and he felt happy for the first time in such a long time. Now he felt special in Kouyou life as a friend, someone who he trust so much and cares so much. The whole road to his mother home was silent but Yuu didn’t care…he felt comfortable.

-We’re here-

Kouyou voice startled him and Yuu went out of his daydream quickly, looking through the car window at the house. It was painted red with white details, had two floors and a giant garden full of flowers at the front, there was a small road to the front door made out of red painted stones and flowers. Yuu squealed when he saw the kind of flowers they grew.

-Those are hollyhocks!-   
-I’ve never knew you liked them- Kouyou raised his eyebrow  
-Yeah…those are great. I might tell you the story later now we have to go-

So Kouyou opened the front door for the younger and he immediately was greeted by the smell of all kind of food. The sound of steps quickly tapping on the ground scared Yuu and soon a much happier version of a brunette jumped out of nowhere towards Kouyou almost knocking him to the ground but he managed to stay on his feet thanks to the support of the door

-Yutaka! What the hell?!- screamed Kouyou  
-Happy birthday bro!!-   
-You said that to me this morning. Geez dude you seem much more excited than me-

Yuu laughed out loud at the scene and Yutaka looked back at him, showing him his million dollar smile

-Hey Yuu, sorry but I like to annoy this grumpy dick of a brother-   
-Yutaka! Watch your mouth!-

And the voice of a woman stopped everything in its tracks, Kouyou pushed Yutaka to the side and fixed his suit when he saw the older woman walking towards him. He immediately ran to her and picked her up, kissing her cheek in the process and giving her a light spin.

-Don’t do that Kou! You’ll drop me!-  
-Hey mom. Nice to see you today-  
-Yes, yes. Please honey you’re making such a fuzz and our guest does not deserve that-  
-All right, sorry mom-

Kouyou put her down and the woman fixed her purple dress. She had a slim figure, grey hair and looked exactly like Yutaka with the obvious signs of age. She even had that bright smile, Kouyou hugged by her side and the woman sighed.

-Welcome young man. I’m sorry for the show this kids are making-  
-Don’t worry ma’am. They normally don’t look like this, I swear-

Yuu made a deep bow

-My name is Yuu Shiroyama. It’s a pleasure to meet you-

The woman placed both of her hands on Yuu shoulders

-You’re such a beautiful young man! Kouyou talked to me about you but I’ve never expected you to look so great. The pleasure is mine sweetheart, my name is Rina-

Yuu felt in such a warm place now…that’s why Kouyou felt so safe in this place. He felt like heaven. Even when he lived with Takanori he never consider it to be a ‘home’ neither a ‘warm’ place. He now looked straight to the eyes of a solid, loving family.

-Yuta-baby. Why don’t you help me set the table, honey? While I’ll get the food ready-  
-Yeah Yuta-baby- Kouyou chuckled, barely able to hold his laugh –Move your ass-  
-Kouyou! I don’t care if you’re thirty thousand years old. This is my house and I don’t want that language-  
-Sorry mom-

Yes…this definitely was the epitome of a loving family

__________________________________________

Yuu was awfully full

He ate at least a portion of every single food that was set on the table and then the delicious chocolate and almonds cheesecake for dessert…oh man, he just had breakfast, lunch and dinner at the same time. But Yutaka and Kouyou mom surely was a good cook, everything was delicious

-Thank you so much for the food Rina-san. It was awesome-  
-Oh sweetie drop the ‘san’ thingy. It makes me feel old-  
-But you’re old mom- Yutaka said with a smile, still eating from his cheesecake  
-You shut up!-

The woman slapped his son on the shoulder and brought the laughs out of everyone at the table. Kouyou stood up, still laughing and started to pick the dirty dishes. Yutaka offered to help in the cleaning and soon both brothers got lost in the kitchen. Yuu used his time to take a look around the room…the table wasn’t that big. It had only four chairs and no decoration on top. There were a bunch of pictures in different tables and a bookshelf big enough for a hundred of books.

Yuu looked specially at the biggest picture hanging at the wall

Rina sat on a golden chair with a long, green dress, high heels and luxurious jewelry all over her. A man stood behind her, dressed in a suit with short grey hair and a gentle small. Kouyou was at her right side and Yutaka at her left also wearing suits but looking much younger than this day.

-May I ask you a question…uhm…Rina?-  
-Yes honey. What is it?-  
-Is he your husband?-

Yuu pointed at the picture. The woman smiled with a hint of sadness in her features.

-Yes…he was my husband. For almost 27 years-

The raven haired sighed. Kouyou talked about his father before but it seemed that his death was a soft topic since he never got deeper in it. Just barely mentioning his name

-We took that photo just two weeks before he died. He suffered a stroke in the morning right after waking up. My kids must have been between 25 and 24…Kouyou carried him up right away and took him to the hospital but it was too late when he got there…it was tough on everyone but we’re slowly getting up. It’s been a while after all-

Yuu got closer to the woman and hugged her briefly

-It’s nice to see you guys are fighting each day. It says a lot about you, Rina-san-  
-Thanks for the compliment but…didn’t I tell you to drop the ‘san’?-  
-Oh! Sorry!-

Both laughed and Kouyou came back cleaning one of his hands in his suit while he munched on a cookie with the other.

-What were you guys talking about?-  
-Nothing son. Old memories only. Where did you get that cookie?-  
-From the jar. You can’t place it over the fridge anymore-   
-Hey mom! Guess what?! Kouyou found the cookie jar!-

Yutaka voice from the distance made everyone laugh yet again.

____________________________________

-So…what about that story with your love for the hollyhocks?-

Kouyou quickly typed on his laptop while Yuu sat in front of him on his desk, with an open book in one hand and his pencil writing on a notebook in the other. They came back from Rina house not so long ago and decided to take on their responsibilities together. They both sat at Kouyou office, working in the dark with the help of the dim light sorting through the windows.

-Mhm…- Yuu stopped writing and Kouyou stopped typing –You see when I was young, Taka used to call me “Aoi” not like the color but like the flower, the hollyhock. The day we became friends he said I was a flower blooming in the rubble so I started to like those flowers…I have a bunch of them at home-

Kouyou looked at him deeply, trying to search for his gaze in the middle of the darkness. Yuu ended up making eye contact and keeping it

-My teddy back at the orphanage was called “Hockie”. I remember now that you said “Hollyhock”-

The older man got up from his chair and started looking deep into the office until he found something. He gently placed it close to Yuu so he could see the object, it was the teddy bear. Old and worn out with some repairs here and there but still showing his blue color

-I never knew if it was a cheap version of a care bear or what- he chuckled –But it’s been with me since I was six. Mom is been fixing him year after year since she meet me. I’m too old to sleep with him now but he was my partner in crime and the one that kept the nightmares away so…he is special to me just like the hollyhocks are special to you-

Yuu smiled and caressed the bear a few times, his fur still soft after all this years.

-You won’t need another teddy while I’m around- the young man voice turned soft and calm

Kouyou reached his hand to touch the bear

-Really? Why?-

Yuu placed his hand on top of Kouyou cold one

-Because I will keep the nightmares away. That’s a promise-

Kouyou smiled and tightened the hold on his hand

-Will you be my partner in crime too?- Yuu chuckled

-I thought I already was-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, not even Windows updates as much as me *badjoke*
> 
> As you can see, Kouyou and Yuu relationship starts to take a more romantic turn, that's why I wanted to make this story bigger so I could write this kind of scenes that will be important in the future...
> 
> Anyways, thank you very much for all the love and reading!


	8. Snow White Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the middle of the snow, Yuu gets a new nickname and Kouyou a new partner in crime.

Yuu heard loud steps outside his room door.

He was a few weeks short of ending his period. October ran freely trough the calendar and with him, the winter break got closer and closer (a time of the year he loved deeply). Homework disappeared slowly, the tests turned easier and professor closed the last topics of the year to end their respective classes.

Now, our dear raven haired had a lot of free time in his hands and a bunch of hours to sleep. Just like today, when his sleep got disturbed by the big amount of noise outside his door.

With the biggest scowl on his face, he got up and opened the door.

Kouyou was about to knock on his face. Dressed in his usual black suit, he was missing the cross necklace and his watch.

Both stared at each other like they were some kind of thing coming from space or the afterlife.

-Uhm…good morning?- Yuu said, awkwardly  
-Good morning- Kouyou greeted with a side smile –I came to wake you up-  
-You woke me with those giant steps you know?-

Yuu opened the door slightly so the other could enter to his room, Kouyou quickly stepped inside and sat at the edge of the bed full with messy sheets. The younger started to search for clothes on his closet, trying to find something to fit his morning mood and get rid of his grey boxers and One Piece t-shirt.

-I don’t have school today Kouyou. Why would you wake me?-  
-I know you don’t have school, silly-  
-Well…meanie for you then-  
-I have to fly to Hokkaido in one hour so I can check the last details of the new car-

From the front pocket of his blazer, he pulled out a pair of blue and white tickets with the name of a well-known (and luxurious) local airline.

-I bought tickets for two but Yutaka is terrified of planes and my mother hates the cold, now I have no one to come with me…do you mind?-  
-All the way to Hokkaido?!-

Yuu almost jumps in his place. That place was the best you could say to a person who loves the snow and the cold weather…like saying to a kid he would go to Disneyland totally free.

-Of course I’ll go! Let me pack my stuff!-  
-Don’t carry a lot of things. It’ll be a quick trip all right? We’ll be back at night-  
-Perfect. I wasn’t thinking on bringing a lot anyways. My old backpack with a pair of clean underwear and a toothbrush is more than enough-

Kouyou shook his head, smiling and then walked to the door taking the plane tickets with him. Yuu looked at him from head to toe

-I see you in twenty minutes-

He walked out and Yuu squealed

He loved to visit the infamous cold prefecture but also travelling with Kouyou…all this months, since his birthdays, he been dropping little hints at him just so he would now how interested he was. He was handsome, rich and owner of a corporation with unlimited potential and, deep in his heart, he was a good guy waiting to be healed by somebody.

He loved that need for protection…he really wanted to protect him. Keep him away from the world and never let someone touch him.

But Kouyou just wouldn’t catch the hints, not even if he placed them right in his face. Maybe he wanted only a friendship, hell, maybe he wasn’t even interested in men and there goes Yuu, flirting with him like it was nothing. The raven haired had never been on a relationship, at least not seriously and he knew Kouyou would be a great, big first step.

Minutes after, he finished packing clean underwear, a pair of socks and a big jacket in his old and ripped backpack. He went flying out of his room and saw Kouyou outside his home, talking to an older man.

-Yuu- he spoke with a strong voice –Let’s go or we’ll lose our flight-

Yuu only nodded and ran again, closing the front door of the Takashima mansion.

A few moments after, Yuu realized the older man was the chauffeur taking them to the airport. He didn’t work for Kouyou but for Yutaka (who still couldn’t get his driving license, Kouyou almost laughed to tears when telling this) and the younger of the businessman sent him so he could help them anyway he could.

Half an hour later, they were flying through Japan sky

It was a rather short flight since they flew out of Tokyo but still, Yuu was going to enjoy it one way or another. Kouyou carefully read a book which Yuu couldn’t see its cover but judging by the words it was related to poetry.

-What are you reading, grumpy?-  
-Eh? Uhm…a compilation of poems. I found it in my library, probably a gift from my father. I read it when I have some free time-  
-I didn’t know you liked that kind of literature-  
-I don’t, I’ll rather read a thriller novel but…this is some kind of special. Besides, I’ve read most of the novels I have about two or three times-

Yuu felt dazzled with his face which, since a few seconds ago, got lost in his reading while talking about his preferences in books. This man was attractive…but Yuu looked beyond that fair skin and good looks. He looked at the man who talked about thriller novels with such love and said “my library” like it was the biggest treasure in the whole world.

How could he get that man?

-I hope you could show me some-

Kouyou smiled widely

-Sure, when we get back I lend you one or two-

The rest of the trip was absolute silence. Yet again, it was a silence comfortable for both of them.

___________________________________________________________

Both of them reached the hotel near the afternoon.

Kouyou choose to rent only one room since they were just leaving their things in a safe place and not some place to sleep. Yuu immediately used place bathroom and Kouyou looked at his suit in front of the mirror, trying to look well. The younger man got out of the bathroom and, instead of checking him out, he tried to help.

His hands reached for him, fixing his blazer. Yuu helped him look perfect for the meeting. They were so close, their breaths melding together, Kouyou strong scent meeting Yuu soft aroma…

And the raven haired couldn’t hold back

Yuu took a long breath

-Kouyou- he breathed out  
-Yes?-

The businessman voice got gentler, softer…like he knew something

-Can I kiss you?-

Yuu lowered his gaze. Kouyou eyes filled with surprise, wide open. But that reaction lasted just a few seconds and then it transformed into a long sigh and a soft laugh. Yuu looked up again and felt a slight pang in his chest at the soft laugh that, in other times, made him smile.

Kouyou laughed again and shook his head

He leaned a bit towards the younger man, their faces barely a few centimeters away

-Do it Yuu-

And that was the last thing the raven haired needed to know

He took his face between his hands and caressed his cheeks with his thumbs for a long time, trying to learn all of his facial features like they were some kind of map to keep him alive. He placed his lips gently on the other man and heard how he swallowed a gasp in his throat, probably an involuntary reflex of his fear for contact.

Yuu didn’t let him go, tangling his arms around his neck while Kouyou placed his hands on his waist. Both of them melting into that slow, romantic kiss letting their lips do the talking about their feelings and all the hints in the last months. Letting that kiss to break the thin line between hate and friendship, leaving an open space to romance.

There wasn’t a sensual tongue battle, just a small fight between lips. Yuu was completely satisfied, feeling in harmony and calm. He felt protected around the man that started a weird relationship between them at the beginning of the year.

The kiss broke when none of them could hold their breath. Instead of pulling back and looking at their eyes, they remained in a hug. Yuu hiding his face in Kouyou chest and the older placing his chin on top of his head, taking his hands to his back and drawing circles in it.

-So here we are- Kouyou broke the silence –This wasn’t meant to happen. What am I going to say to Takanori?-

Yuu forgot that name completely in the past months, they stopped talking since that day.

-You’ll better send him your cutest picture because you’re going to be in every single paper of the country-

Kouyou tightened the hug

-Are you sure about this?-  
-Of course…why are you asking?-  
-It’s my duty…you should think about it ok? I’m going to the meeting when I get back we can go touring and have lunch in some nice place…talk about it-

Yuu felt slightly disappointed hearing those words…Kouyou wanted nothing with him? But he answered the kiss…that wasn’t enough to seal this new ‘contract’?

It seemed not

The raven nodded and broke the hug

Kouyou looked at his somber expression and his gaze softened. Taking a few steps forward he placed a long kiss on his forehead, Yuu closed his eyes savoring the soft contact.

-Think about it Yuu…we’ll talk later-

And then just like the wind, he was gone.

Yuu was left in the hotel bed making what Kouyou ordered: wait for him and of course think about everything…the younger man asked himself the same words Kouyou said just a few minutes (or moments) ago.

_Are you sure about this?_

Did he really loved him? What if everything was just a spoiled and desperate decision from a naïve twenty year old boy? Yuu wasn’t sure, the only thing he was a 100% sure was his need to protect Kouyou, never let anyone burst his little bubble of happiness where he was placed…

Kouyou wasn’t so sure about everything even when he kissed him back

Yuu turned around in the bed, looking deeply at the window covered in thick brown colored curtains. The room was big, almost on a suite size. The bed was about 1/3 of the room, on both sides of the bed there was a small table and the difference between them was a lamp placed on the right one. The walls were red with golden details on the corners. There also was a sofa on the corner and a medium sized LED screen in front of the bed. The window was at the left of the room

Yuu got up and opened the curtains before getting back to bed

He closed his eyes, drifting away to the kiss…the sensation of his lips, his smell, his warmth and gentleness in his hands and movements. Kouyou looked full of experience while he kissed him and Yuu quickly tried to erase that thought from his head…he liked to think that Kouyou kept a little of innocence and fear to the world.

He should stop thinking about so many things and rest. He got up yet again so he could wear his jacket, the room got colder as time went by while he looked at the window. With all those things on his mind, he completely forgot about the amazing weather outside, the thermometer showed around 3 or 4 degrees.

Looking at the window and feeling warm, he felt asleep.

When he woke up, the room was completely dark. It was snowing slowly outside and darkness covered the streets, some people walked here and there. Worried about the hour he quickly sat on the bed looking around the room for any hints of the older man.

He felt surprised when he found Kouyou right at his side, sitting with his back to the wall, his head slightly tilted to the right, his breathing calm and the poetry book laying between his hands and his lap. He was soundly asleep while he waited for Yuu to wake up but he was a light sleeper since, as soon as Yuu sat on the bed, his eyes shot open and he started to rub them with the back of his hand.

-So cute- Yuu giggled, placing a hand on his mouth

Kouyou smiled weakly

-You’re finally up sleepy head-  
-Finally? How long did I slept?-  
-Mhm…maybe an hour and a half-  
-Oh god…I’m so sorry Kouyou, you wanted to go touring and have lunch and look at this…we’re already out of daylight-

Kouyou shook his head, still smiling

-Don’t worry, we can go walk somewhere. It’s not that late but you know how winter can be…making the days shorter and stuff-

Yuu zipped his jacket, combed his fingers through his hair and walked to the door waiting for the businessman who was busy looking for something thick enough to cover him in the freezing weather

-Kouyou…a few hours ago. What did you mean with the ‘think about it’ thing?-  
-Mhm…I’ll explain, let’s go-

So both of them got out together, walking side to side on the sidewalk. Both of them with their hands deep in their pockets. Silence reached their walk and Yuu slowly turned towards a park that had few people and a bunch of empty, snow-free benches.

Said place was a paradise for Yuu

It was completely white, full of snow. Yuu smiled widely and walked towards one of the benches so he could sit, Kouyou sat right beside him.

-I love snow. It’s perfect- Yuu whispered  
-It is…just like you-

Yuu looked at him feeling his cheeks heat up right at the moment. Kouyou wasn’t joking instead he was looking at him with that deep, bored gaze. The one that Yuu feared a few months back, the one that felt like looking at the eyes of a snake. Now it was full of calm

-Your skin is pale, your hair deeply black and your lips red- this time the businessman giggled –You fill all the requirements for Snow White…I’m calling you like that from now on-

Yuu blushed and looked at other point in the park

-My Snow White Queen…I’ll like the sound of that, has a perfect ring-  
-Stop it Kouyou…you still don’t answer my question-

Kouyou sighed and then shrugged

-I wasn’t convinced you wanted something with me…I thought you only wanted this because I have money or because you’re young. I was sure you only wanted a few rounds of sex and that’s it…then I thought about it, you are not like that. Not even one bit. You’re unique, a sun with all the people dancing around him and smiling at its brightness, you’re special with all that dedication and all those vivid colors inside your eyes...you’re the only person I trust to do this to me-

Kouyou leaned towards him and, while holding his chin, kissed his lips gently one more time

Both of them pulled back but remained close to each other, their foreheads pressing together. The dark golden orbs of Kouyou losing against the deep black of Yuu. The world around them slowly getting blurry, their ears closing only to the sound of their voices.

-Maybe I was trying to convince myself Yuu…now I understand. Even if you’re not sure and you don’t want this I’m going to try and make you stay by my side. Fuck Takanori…I’ll pay him everything he wants, I’ll even send him my cutest picture if that means you’ll stay with me more than one fucking year…let me be your servant Snow White Queen…I’ll promise its worth it, I’ll promise I’ll open my heart completely to you-

Yuu felt a lump in his throat, he searched for Kouyou hands still not finding the right words to say

-What do you say Yuu? Will you be my partner in crime?-

The raven laughed out loud and launched himself to Kouyou arms

-Idiot- Yuu mumbled against Kouyou cheek –Always asking questions that are already answered…of course I want to. I want to erase all that darkness from your heart Kou…I’ll make it, we will make it. Together we’ll make it work-

Kouyou smiled and closed his eyes. This was perfect, much more of what he deserved. From hate to friendship and from friendship to love…

Yuu knew love will fill his heart

Kouyou knew his wounds would close soon

And fate knew they were deeply, completely tangled in the red thread.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah...next really fast update 
> 
> This might be the last update of the year since I'm going back to school in a week and a half (and I can't write something in that time...my brain, hands and motivations are just too damn slow) so yeah...next update will be surely in 2017. Next chapter we get to see Takanori and the tension rises thanks to our new lovebirds. 
> 
> Happy (early) new year, everyone! Thank you so much for the love and reading.


	9. Loser

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takanori is not made of steel and he finally opens his heart to Kouyou Takashima, his newly found enemy.

Kouyou came home past midnight

He tried to make the least possible noise with his keys and the door so he wouldn’t wake up his lover who surely loved to sleep in their room. Lover…it sounded really good through his lips and his mind. ‘Lover’ now meant ‘Raven-haired beauty’ and that brought a smile to his face.

They been dating for a month and weeks now and in all this time they got to knew each other even more, like a pair of open books. Yuu finally read all those thriller novels, Kouyou wrote the last essay of the period for a perfectionist teacher. They spent their nights talking to each other about their fears, favorite things, childhood memories. Kouyou knew he was falling for this boy harder and harder each day.

Yuu was finally on his winter break and he could care less about waiting for his older lover deep into the night (even if said lover hated that, saying that he deserved ‘a thousand amount of sleep’). The businessman slowly got rid of his blazer and unbuttoned the first buttons of his work shirt, thanks to the heating system in his home, he wouldn’t feel the crazy cold from the outside world.

He went upstairs slowly right to their room (which used to be “his”) still trying to keep Yuu in a deep slumber.

He found the younger man sleeping in the bed, hugging a pillow to his chest with his cellphone long forgotten in a corner of the sheets. Kouyou smiled at the beautiful sight enlightened by the moon. He wanted to take a bath but…sleeping right at Yuu side felt much more inviting.

Yuu whined when he felt the bed dipping with Kouyou weight. Kouyou immediately hushed and lulled him with soft caresses to his face while he picked up the forgotten phone and placed it into a table next to the bed. Yuu slowly opened one eye.

-Kou…?-   
-I’m here love, go back to sleep-   
-Mhm- he whined yet again and mumbled –What hour…?-   
-1:30. Go back to sleep baby…I’m staying with you tomorrow-

Kouyou felt guilty saying this…they did spent their nights together but it was never enough. No matter how many things they talked, it was never enough and Kouyou felt he was failing Yuu.

All of his employees started taking a break. December finally ran free through the calendar and soon the city would be filled with Christmas carols, green and red lights, images of Santa Claus. All of them wanted to spend time at home with their families and Kouyou refused to take a vacation in the middle of a big project like the Hellion White (a recent name to the previous ‘Hellion III’). Maybe it was finally time to be a little egoist and take a rest.

Yuu snuggled at his side and Kouyou kissed his forehead, running a hand through his back.

-Good night grumpy- Yuu mumbled yet again   
-Hmph- Kouyou laughed softly –Good night baby…sleep well-

Both of them soon fell asleep

The morning after, Yuu woke up alone in the room.

He wasn’t sure about what he said to Kouyou last night, he wasn’t sure about Kouyou words either…but he was sure Kouyou said “I’ll spend the day with you” or something along those lines. Maybe he meant other time of the day or going home a few hours before midnight.

Yuu sighed. Well…today he is getting another boring morning watching zombie series.

Soon the door creaked open.

Kouyou walked inside with a big silver tray in his hands filled with all kinds of breakfast: juice, fruit, yogurt, toasted bread, bacon even a pair of scrambled eggs. Yuu felt hungry just by looking at all those delicious things. He also looked at the way Kouyou dressed: A pair of grey pants alongside a plain white t-shirt and bare footed.

Yuu smiled widely.

-Heeey there…good morning handsome. This is my kind of room service!-

Kouyou laughed out loud.

-I brought you breakfast-  
-I see that silly. Come here and give me a good morning kiss, I hope it comes with the service-

Kouyou nodded with a smile and then left the tray in the table beside the bed so he could finally get close to Yuu and give him a passionate kiss on the lips. Thanks to the heat of the moment, Yuu placed his hands on the older man shoulders and in a quick movement left him under his body, sitting in his lap and leaning for a new kiss.

Therefore, Kouyou broke the kiss with a smile and a soft laugh.

-I said I brought you breakfast Yuu-   
-Oh come on…we’re having fun right now Kou-   
-Yeah…definitely but I spent a lot of time in that breakfast and it’s getting cold…I’m not changing MY food for a few hours of sex-

Yuu burst out laughing and hugged Kouyou really tight. The older man soon hugged him back. Minutes after they were sharing the food on the bed, talking about the last book read by Kouyou a few days ago and how much Yuu wanted to read it now that he knew a little bit about it.

Kouyou phone ringed

The businessman made a frown and picked the call. He sighed when the name ‘Yutaka’ shone in the screen. His brother definitely set the corporation on fire and now he couldn’t put it out. Where he would work now? This damn brat…couldn’t do anything right.

-You’re on speaker-   
-Speaker? Oh! Hey Yuu!-

Yuu giggled

-Good morning Yutaka-  
-Yutaka! What the fuck do you want?!-   
-Don’t talk to me like that you douche. You have an invitation, miss PA give it to me so I opened it-   
-Good job puppy! You found your spot on the ‘I shouldn’t read private mail’ shelf-  
-It’s an invitation from Toxic. There’s a new auction for Christmas Eve-

Yuu forgot his appetite when he heard about that place…he felt uncomfortable getting back after months of absence. He felt like reaching an unknown place filled with mysterious people. Kouyou looked at him with a worried expression and then sighed

-Yutaka I think…I think we won’t go-  
-Why? I’m sure there will be a lot of interesting things. Your boyfriend is Takanori best friend isn’t?-  
-They don’t get along right now, we won’t go-

The raven haired shook his head frantically and whispered a “no, we’re going” like a mantra, trying to take away Kouyou decision. The older man stuttered a bit, fumbling with his words.

-Wait Yuta…we’re going-  
-Really? Yuu is okay?-  
-So it seems-  
-Great! I’ll see you guys at 8:30. See ya-

The call ended and Kouyou threw his phone against the bed, Yuu opened his eyes wide with surprise at the outburst.

-What is it Yuu? Now you want to see Takanori?-

His voice was strong but still far from screaming. Yuu was scared…he never liked seeing Kouyou mad not even for a few seconds and maybe the fear was reflected in his eyes because the businessman immediately ran to his side and hugged him, hiding the rage of a few seconds ago.

-Yuu…I’m sorry…I…I just want you to be safe all right?-  
-Taka would never hurt me…he is not like that. I want to talk to him, talk to him about our relationship Kou…he is my family, he is my home. Just like I met your family I think it’s time you meet mine. I’m just going to talk ok? Just a little bit-

Kouyou took the delicate and soft hands of the younger man, placing a kiss on his knuckles.

-If that’s what you want I won’t stop you. We’re going to see Takanori and I’ll be there for you. He is going to meet another me, someone he never met before and I will try to fill all of his standards so he finally knows that there’s nothing more important for me other than you…-

Yuu nodded

-Can I get a hug? - Kouyou asked gently

Yuu felt silent and he hugged the man of his dreams, hiding his face in the crook of his neck. Kouyou placed a kiss on his hair

-Don’t worry Yuu. I’ll be there-

________________________________________________________________

And so, the auction came.

Yuu and Kouyou arrived to Toxic together but, as soon as the chauffeur stopped at the front door, they knew nothing about each other. They went separate ways to try and keep away the annoying media that covered the event…Yuu didn’t want to turn into a celebrity just by sheer luck.

So Kouyou went to a corner alongside Yutaka and Yuu walked to the bar.

Akira was busy with a pair of drinks, still a smile painted his face when he saw the younger.

-Hey Yuu! Damn kid you been away for a long time! How are you?-  
-Fine Aki- Yuu smiled awkwardly –It’s been a while indeed…I came with Kou for the auction-   
-Kou?-

A foreign voice reached his ears and Yuu immediately turned his head in the direction of the sound

Takanori stood there with his hands in his pockets, his hair falling through his shoulders, dressed in his usual red suit used only for these mayor events. For the first time in many years, Yuu felt scared of looking at those pair of bright blue eyes…it felt like looking at an iceberg.

-Taka…-  
-So you came with Takashima huh…or should I call him Kou now?-

Yuu lowered his gaze. He felt a lump in his throat

-I…just want to talk-  
-Talk? Come on, you been more than four months away from me and now you say that? Stop fucking around Yuu-  
-Please…I want to talk about us-

The way he said it…so broken and hurt made Takanori heart tremble with guilt. The older man let out a long sigh and made a hand gesture to Akira so they could have a little more of privacy. Kouyou looked at the scene from the corner, he immediately got up and half made his to them when Yutaka stopped him.

-Stop it Kouyou, don’t make a scene-  
-A scene? I’m just trying to help Yuu-  
-I know that but this is a conversation between them and you should stay away. Save your words for later-

Kouyou was left standing in the middle of the room with his hands clenching in a fist.

Takanori sighed

-All right, we talk. Go to my office after the auction ends-

Yuu nodded still with his gaze down and Takanori turned around walking towards the scenario so he could finally begin with the event of the night. The auction, as always, was a big success with the main prize being a replica of a famous Da Vinci painting bought by the owner of a clothes company.

Yuu felt awfully bad after the last purchase…

He looked at Takanori office like it was the door to his death.

Kouyou ignored Yutaka and ran to Yuu side. The younger man flew right at his open arms as soon as he saw him, hiding his face in the broad chest of his lover.

-You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to- said Kouyou –Let’s go home…I can talk to him tomorrow-   
-I’m just nervous…he looked so cold and distant-  
-I could see that even from far away. Are you sure about this?-

A slight nod was his answer and then, the younger broke the hug and walked to Takanori office.

Said man was behind his desk, signing a bunch of papers probably from the last big sale and when he heard the door creaking open, he got rid of the papers and his pen. Placing his attention fully on the boy.

-You said you wanted to talk about us and I’m going to listen Yuu but first I want an explanation on why you never called for the last fucking months. Is Takashima that important to you now? Did he stop you from calling? What the hell happened? What did I do wrong for you to punish me like that?-

Yuu chewed on his lower lip nervously and fidgeted with his hands

-I’m the one you should blame Taka…it has nothing to do with Kouyou. First it was the school…you know how it can get on the last days of the period…then it was me. I thought you were angry because of the things I said of Kouyou nightmares so I stopped calling and visiting…I didn’t want to make you mad-

Takanori placed a cigarette on his lips and after lightning it up, blew the smoke slowly out of his mouth

-I’m mad right now Yuu Shiroyama. That’s not a good excuse if you’re trying to make one-  
-It’s not an excuse!-  
-Then tell me the truth!-  
-That’s the truth! I didn’t want you to pull me away from Kouyou! I wanted to help him and…!-

The sudden silence startled Takanori

-And what Yuu?-  
-And I fell in love with him…we’re dating now-

Takanori felt his heart broke in a million pieces, the sharp edges making a hole in his chest. He threw the cigarette away and punched the top of the desk with force

-What?!-  
-I’m dating Kouyou Takashima!-  
-Why?! What the fuck did you want huh?! You had money, you had education, you had love when you were here! What else did you wanted?! Turn yourself into the whore of that rich dick?!-

Yuu started crying at the hurtful words, he placed a hand on his mouth.

-I thought you would support me…- Yuu said between sobs –I knew you would get mad because you hate him so much but I thought at the end you would say ‘is okay’…now you’re even calling me a whore like all I wanted was to have sex with him…-

That’s when Takanori realized he fucked up, big time. He wouldn’t repair Yuu broken heart in a million years. Trying to solve his mistake, he lowered his voice to a whisper and got closer to Yuu taking slow careful steps.

-Yuu…no. I…I never meant to say that I…-   
-You said it Takanori…you said and that’s enough. You don’t have to make me feel guilty about whom I love…I’m sorry for making you mad and I promise I will call more frequently…I’m sorry-

And then he left the office, not caring about the screams of the older man

Kouyou was waiting for him outside, feeling beyond angry when he saw the tears in his lover face. He heard everything behind the closed door.

-Come here baby…is okay-  
-He hates me…he didn’t even let me talk-

Another hug was shared between them, Kouyou running a hand through his hair to try and sooth him while Yuu cried his heart out in his chest

Takanori went out of his office a few minutes after looking at the scene with pained eyes. He made immediate contact with Kouyou brown orbs but tried to ignore him, focusing on Yuu

-Yuu…I’m sorry-

The raven haired just shook his head, never leaving Kouyou

-I heard your words you disgusting piece of shit- Kouyou hissed –Are you happy now?-  
-You shut up! It was you who drove him away from me!-   
-You made this yourself!- Kouyou screamed back –You hurt him, you didn’t even listen!-

And the businessman blood was boiling with anger, he wanted to crush the man on the red suit with his bare hands. But Yuu couldn’t see it, he didn’t deserve it

-Baby wait for me outside- he whispered in the younger ear –Yutaka is waiting there, I go in a minute-  
-Kou please…don’t hurt him-  
-I want to talk and the fucker better listen if he doesn’t want to end up with a broken nose and a trip to the hospital-

Yuu nodded and then ran outside Toxic

Both men were left looking at each other

-I really want to kill you Takanori but I made a promise to make him happy, to be his servant no matter what…you don’t even know how much you break his heart. He gave you an explanation on why he never called and he said he is sorry…what more do you want?-

Takanori looked down

-It’s not about that Takashima...is about how fucking unfair everything is…he was meant to be with me not with you. He was meant to love me…not some brat like you…-

Kouyou opened his eyes wide in shock

-You’re in love with him-  
-I couldn’t stop it…I watched him grow day by day, turn into a beautiful angelic being…he’s been with me since he was ten years old and I loved him from day one. I know what he loves and what he hates, I know that, when Hide died, he didn’t leaved his room in a whole week, I know he loves black coffee and likes to leave the door open…What the fuck do you think you know about him?-

Kouyou felt pity

-I know that he loves you with all his heart and that you’re the most special person on earth for him. I know you’re the one he looks up to and the one he is always trying to appease day by day always trying to pay for everything you done for him…he loves you deeply and I could never replace that spot in his heart…but you have to respect him and his decision. I’m not you Takanori…and that’s exactly why he loves me on a different way.

The blond sniffed loudly and lit up a second cigarette

-Nothing I say now is going to repair the damage I did and I made a huge mistake- he said with a hoarse voice –I’m an asshole…the least I could do is tell you to make him happy, to keep being his servant because he deserves it you said it yourself…I’m not the right man and I accept my lost to you Takashima…just tell him I’m sorry and that I’m waiting for him anytime he wants to come, I’m never going to be mad at him from now on…just don’t tell him about my feelings, keep it between us. Please-

Kouyou nodded

-I’ll promise that. I’ll take care of him and your feelings-   
-Before you go I’ll have something for him-

He went inside his office and came back with a photograph on his right hand

-Give him this-

Kouyou didn’t look at the photo, trying to keep it private

-I’ll take care of him Takanori. Be sure of that-  
-Now I’m sure of that-

Takanori extended his left hand, trying to take a hand shake from the businessman. Kouyou answered with a firm shake and a light smile, placing both of his hands on top of Takanori one.

-Go now or he is going to think you really beat my ass-

And then the blond saw the taller man leave Toxic. He fell to the ground on his knees and then on his back, looking at the ceiling like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Oh man…he wanted to cry and scream but he was going to be strong and keep looking forward. Now he was sure that Yuu would get back…maybe not tomorrow or the next month but he was going to get back

That was more than enough…for now.

_______________________________________________________________

Yutaka left them at Kouyou home a few minutes after leaving Toxic.

Yuu never stopped clutching the photograph to his chest the whole trip back home and Kouyou didn’t force him to show the piece of paper.

But deep into the night, when his raven haired beauty finally fell asleep, he saw the photograph lying on top of his pillow probably forgotten by the tired young man. Kouyou picked it up and give it a look

A kid version of Yuu stood beside a crouched and younger Takanori, a small birthday present in the hands of the infant with a park decorating the background. It had a sentence written in white ink

_“I love you, I’m sorry”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Partially inspired by Big Bang "Loser" 
> 
> This chapter was really tough to write...I wanted to give Taka a happy ending but holy flying fuck it was hard...at the end I think he is okay, I also wanted to explore more of Yuu and Kouyou relationship and guess everything is going well so far. 
> 
> School is being a pain in the ass (like most of the time) so I'm sure the updates are going to be slow. Anyways, this story has only three chapters left and I had an ending in my head but now I'm trying to make another one for the lulz. I hope everything goes according to my freaking brain...
> 
> Longest author note ever. Thank you very much for all the love and the readings!


	10. Promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuu realizes he needs nothing but Kouyou

It was a week before Yuu 21st birthday

The raven haired was still recovering from the last time he saw Takanori, slowly healing from the deep wounds of his words and the confusion of his actions. Kouyou never said anything about the conversation he had with the older man, keeping it in a “Sorry, I promised not to say anything”.

He spent Christmas with Kouyou family, having a big dinner and some sort of small party that he enjoyed plenty. He got all kinds of gifts the morning after: a box of chocolates and a ‘Helloween’ hoodie from Kouyou mom, a watch from Yutaka and a ticket to the next rock festival in Japan by Kouyou and he couldn’t help but trail back to those days with Takanori.

When he was a kid they would spend all day watching movies and playing videogames until he had to sleep so ‘Santa would come and visit him’. After he grew up things didn’t change, they still played videogames and watched cheesy movies occasionally having pizza or fried chicken for dinner, never really caring about the date. After all it was usually a time for lovers right? And they just were friends or at least that’s what Yuu loved to think.

He wanted to talk to Takanori one more time…one more time just to tell him how special he was…how he needed him.

-Yuu? Is everything okay baby?-

Kouyou voice made him come back to reality

His older lover had one of those rare free days and they choose to spend it in his apartment doing absolutely nothing, just cuddling in bed and talking about random things. Yuu had a few days left of his break before going back to school and he wanted to spend every single minute with his lover.

So right now, as they were cuddling in bed and Yuu lay his head on top of Kouyou chest, he felt lost.

-Sorry…-  
-Are you okay? You seem…off- Kouyou said with concerned eyes  
-I…I was just thinking about…Taka…I mean not in a romantic way…-  
-Don’t worry baby, I understand. You must be worried about him right?-  
-It’s just that…he has a stupid habit of destroying himself Kou…he is terribly selfless and that scares me…you have no idea how much. I don’t want him to make anything stupid…I just want him to be safe…-

Yuu felt like crying. He hid his face in Kouyou chest and let his tears roll slowly down his cheeks. Why? He had his happiness with Kouyou but it wasn’t complete if Takanori wasn’t around…

Kouyou softly combed his fingers through his hair and placed a light kiss on top of his head.

-Hey Yuu…what would you do if I give you one big present? The best one you’ve ever had-

Yuu raised his head, his eyes red from crying but full of curiosity. Kouyou saw this as a way to continue

-How about if we bring Takanori for your birthday? I know you two still feel a little restless around each other but he’s been around you every single birthday since you were ten…it’ll be great if he visits you-

And the eyes of the younger man lit up suddenly he looked…alive

-Are you serious Kouyou?! I thought you hated his guts!-  
-Come on…I mean, he is a real pain in the ass but…I would do anything for you even if that means having him around. I don’t really care, I’ll eat my pride and well…fuck it- he let out a soft laugh –Besides…I don’t know how to sing a good ‘happy birthday’ song-

Yuu immediately jumped on top of him and placed butterfly kisses all over his face

-Yuu! Stop it babe! You look like a damn puppy right now!-   
-Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I love you so fucking much right now you grumpy bastard!-  
-Yeah yeah! Stop it now!-

They stopped the game and looked at each other, Yuu softly smiled and kissed his lover in the corner of his lips.

-I love you Kou…and I mean it. I really, really love you-

Kouyou smiled back

-I love you too. Thank you for making my life this beautiful-

Yuu felt overwhelmed by his words and he leaned in for another kiss this time caressing his cheeks with his palms

-It’s almost a year since I met you- the younger said with a low voice –Who would have thought?-   
-No one- Kouyou closed his eyes –I thought you wouldn’t be around by this time of the year-   
-It was the best year of my life…even if the beginning was weird and…awkward-   
-Yeah…it felt like the first day of school-  
-Right! Like…when they tell you to say your name in front of the class-  
-That sucks so bad…- Yuu laughed out loud  
-I’m glad someone thinks the same! Everyone used to tell me I was such a weirdo because I hated those stupid presentations-

Their laughs softly vanished in the air and yet again they were left looking at each other in complete silence. Yuu leaned for another kiss this time a little bit more daring than the last, biting his lover lips in the process. Kouyou softly whimpered but kissed him back anyway he could. The raven kisses got lower, making a wet trail from his jaw to his neck.

Kouyou closed his eyes…trying to enjoy everything

But he couldn’t

The nightmares, the memories, the pain from that day…

His breath got louder but Yuu saw this as a sign of arousal so he kept kissing the soft skin under his mouth. Kouyou placed his hands between their bodies

-Yuu…it’s enough. Stop-

No answer

Kouyou was getting scared

-Please…stop-

Still no answer.

In an act of self-defense, Kouyou pushed Yuu away from him and pinned him right under his body. The younger looked shocked…why…why did Kouyou had those eyes so full of fear? He thought they were having a good time

-Kou…?-  
-I told you to stop!- he raised his voice but it wasn’t an angry tone, he was scared –Why wouldn’t you stop?!-   
-I’m sorry I…Kou…I…-

Kouyou sat on the bed, shaking his head and looking at his hands

-I’m so sorry Kouyou…please, please forgive me I wasn’t thinking I…-

Since they started their relationship, there was no sexual contact between them. Kisses and cuddles were their limit. Both were completely okay with this and never really made a move for the ‘next step’ until now at least…Yuu felt terribly guilty, he completely forgot of Kouyou fear of being touched…

After a few seconds of silence, Kouyou finally talked

-It’s okay Yuu…it’s completely normal you want this. It’s me who is sorry. I should just shut up-   
-No no no…don’t say that!-

Yuu hugged him tight, his arms circling around his waist

-I was being selfish and I thought you liked it- Yuu voice sounded pained –You don’t have to do this if you want to, there’s no need to…we’ve been happy like this for months, almost a year now! I don’t want you to feel scared…I want you to feel good, to know how much I love you! I…I’ve never done this before and…and that’s why I want it to be special to you too! I love you like that…I will take care of you…when you’re ready-

After a few moments, Kouyou slowly hugged him back

-I’ve never done this too- he said with a shaky voice –At least not consensually…never had the interest in it, never had a bunch of boyfriends or girlfriends…I was scared like that…-

He pulled back from the hug and looked at the raven straight into his eyes

-Let me give it a shot okay? I…have nothing to fear…not when I’m with you-

Yuu felt his tears coming back to his eyes and, with a big smile, nodded at Kouyou. Placing another kiss into his lips

Each one of their clothes got discarded to the ground, scattering all over the room in a genuine messy way. The kisses never stopped, some intense some short, feeling desperate to continue and savor each spot on their skin.

Yuu sat on Kouyou lap, placing his legs at both of his sides so he would be in a comfortable position. Kouyou lost all of his fear, trusting Yuu with all his heart while he ran the tip of his fingers along Yuu naked back keeping every touch as gentle as he could.

The younger kissed the tip of his nose and they both laughed. It was perfect, just plain perfect

Every movement was slow, they slowly traced their bodies trying to memorize all the details and all the soft spots like some kind of map. And so, when Kouyou slowly entered Yuu the younger felt he needed nothing else, he tangled his fingers between his hair just to try and control all the pleasure he was feeling.

Time went by, the younger never knew how much…maybe minutes, maybe hours…he didn’t count, he just gave his body to his lover and loved every single moment of it all. They ended up exhausted, Kouyou was the first one to fall asleep after hugging him tight and resting his head into his chest.

Yuu fought his sleep, trying to stay awake just so he could watch his dreams

-I will never, never hurt you Kouyou- the raven softly mumbled while he combed Kouyou locks

-That’s a promise-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy freaking shit...it's been a daaaamn while since I was around. 
> 
> Wanna know why? School. There. That's fucking it. School is a bitch and that's the bottom line because Stone Cold says so
> 
> They finally do the do! Sorry it wasnt explicit...this scene it's meant to be special to them not much of a 'lets just fuck' kind of scene...And yeah this story was meant for 10 chapters...then I got really wild with the drama and plot and added two more chapters to the mix and now, after months of not writing anything, I decided it would end in 11 chapters. Next chapter it's the end (no shit) of this long, long drama train. I'm already writing it so...I hope I'll be able to post it before my summer it's over :( 
> 
> Thank you very much for reading!


	11. Burning Bright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's nothing ever wrong but nothing's ever right. Such a cruel contradiction...Yuu and Kouyou will learn it the hard way

It was Yuu 21st Birthday

Soft butterfly kisses woke him up in the bright morning and he slowly rubbed his eyes open.

-Wake up baby…happy birthday-

Kouyou voice brought a smile to his lips. So, at the end, he managed to have a free day for him only. Yuu snuggled against his body while the businessman wrapped his arms around him.

-You’re 21 now. Fully legal-   
-Come on- Yuu laughed out loud, punching his chest softly –Thank you for the good wishes-  
-I’m sorry if I can’t sing you a happy birthday song. I’m no good at that-   
-Is okay Kou. I have you here and that’s all that matters-

It was the first birthday without Takanori usual morning song or cake…Yuu slowly zoned out, thinking about those happy days at the side of his father figure. The one who changed so suddenly through the last months, the one who broke his heart ruthlessly

-Yuu? Are you okay?-

Kouyou brought him out of his dreams

-Yeah…sorry-  
-You seem off-  
-I was thinking about stuff. I’m older now, that means I’m one year closer to you-  
-That’s not true silly!- Kouyou laughed this time –You’re older but I’ll be older too!-

Once again Yuu snuggled close to his body, hiding his face between his chest and basking in the beautiful sensation of safeness and pure happiness. Even if Takanori wasn’t around, he still had Kouyou and a lot more to live for…he could go on with many more birthdays like this.

Yuu got out of the bed and started getting ready. Kouyou offered to make breakfast for both of them and then watch his favorite series with a bunch of candy and all kinds of junk food. The raven haired boy loved the idea of spending all day with Kouyou since he was surely going to go back to work a day after and then Yuu also was going back to college.

-I have a present for you-

Kouyou said halfway through their binge watching of series, stuffing his mouth full of cheese popcorn. Yuu stopped looking at the big screen and focused his eyes on his boyfriend

-Really? Where?-

The businessman stopped eating, laughing at the face of the younger boy. Like an excited puppy, Yuu started jumping up and down.

-Where is it Kou?! Give it to me!-   
-I can’t! Is not here Yuu! Yutaka will bring it to you in the afternoon!-   
-Why not now?!-  
-I won’t tell-   
-Kouyou!!-

Between laughs and playful pushes, they continued watching TV.

Time went by, Yuu felt extremely curious about his present…Kouyou went away  about 30 minutes ago, excusing himself with a “I’m going to the bathroom” and that just made him feel more anxious. After 15 more minutes, the front door made a creaking sound signaling someone coming.

-Kou I don’t know what the hell you’re planning but I don’t really like it-   
-Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you-

Yuu turned around slowly to the soft sound of a birthday song playing in the background. He almost dropped the bag of chips he had in his hands right in the spot. He felt slightly numb, shocked when he saw a man standing there behind the couch just a few steps away from the front door. Yutaka was there with him alongside Kouyou

It was Takanori

He was dressed in a blue suit, one of the many he usually used for the auctions back at Toxic, a small cake decorated his hands. The blond smiled widely and fidgeted slightly with the cake

-Don’t look at me like that- he said with his usual deep voice –Come on, move your ass so I can give you a hug-

And Yuu did exactly that. He quickly threw away everything in his hands, Takanori left the cake in a close chair and opened his arms, welcoming his all time friend with sadness and joy at the same time. Yuu slipped his arms behind Takanori neck and hugged him tight, bringing him close to his body like he was going to disappear.

-You’re really here…- Yuu said with a broken voice  
-Of course I’m here. Did you really think I would leave you on this day? Fuck no-

The younger man couldn’t hold back the tears and let them out, falling to the blue suit of his father figure with no sound.

-I’m sorry for being late Yuu- said Yutaka –It was worth the wait-

Kouyou could only look at them with a soft gaze. It was just like he said to Takanori a few months ago: he would never replace that spot in Yuu heart. The businessman got closer to Yutaka and pat him on the back, making a hand gesture for them to go so they could give the others a little bit more of privacy.

Yuu and Takanori remained hugging

-I’m sorry Taka-   
-No, don’t say that- Takanori broke the hug and looked at the eyes of the boy –It’s me who has to say sorry okay? I shouldn’t have said that…you’re no whore, you aren’t like that…I was angry…angry with myself for letting you go like that. I was completely angry at my feelings-

The younger man looked at him with confused eyes

-What are you saying Taka?-  
-So Kouyou never told you?- he chuckled –I guess he kept his promise of not saying a word-

And now Yuu felt a little bit more confused…just what did they talked about in Toxic on that day?

-If I do something…do you promise me to keep quiet? After that I won’t bother you anymore-

Takanori voice dropped even lower. Yuu could only nod

And the older man pulled him down for a kiss

The boy felt shocked and his hands tried to find a way to push him back, to make it stop. Suddenly everything clicked inside his brain: Takanori was in love with him…that’s why he was mad with anger when he spoke about Kouyou. How could he been so blind? It happened all the time in front of his eyes.

Now he felt betrayed

-Yuu?-

A voice made them broke the intimate contact. Yuu eyes immediately clashed with Kouyou’s

He could see it, the killing instinct in his eyes…

Kouyou stepped forward and with blinding speed, he punched Takanori in the face making him stumble. Another punch, this time packed with fury, and the older man fell to the ground. Kouyou quickly straddled him and placed one of his hands in the other neck, punching him right in the nose this time. Blood covered his knuckles and part of his shirt

-I trusted you! You said you left him in my hands! What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!-

Each word was matched with another punch. Yuu was left scared and speechless in the middle of the situation. Yutaka ran towards Kouyou, trying to stop him by pulling at his shirt and torso.

-Kouyou! Leave him now!-  
-Fuck you! I’m not letting go until this bastard is dead!-  
-That’s enough!-   
-Kouyou!- this time Yuu was the one to scream –Is enough!-

The businessman finally let him go, Takanori shook his head and coughed slightly. His nose was bleeding profusely, he had a busted lip and a red angry bruise under his eye. He cleaned the blood flowing through his nose and stood up, wobbling towards the front door

-Did you really think I would let him go just like that? You don’t even know Yuu like I know him-  
-But I tried!- Kouyou was being held down by Yutaka and he struggled to get out –I tried to know him! I tried to make his life as good as it was with you! You betrayed my trust Takanori!-

Yuu was crying now, his sobs filling the awkward silences. Yutaka made a hand gesture towards Takanori trying to keep down his own feelings.

-Takanori just leave now…you really played with all of us. Please just leave-

Takanori glanced at Yuu one last time, longer than expected

-Please!- Yutaka raised his voice, unable to hold Kouyou any longer –Leave!-

The blond opened the door and left with a bang

Yutaka let go of Kouyou who pushed him slightly

-Why did you stop me?!-  
-Did you really wanted to kill that man Kouyou?! It’s not worth it!-  
-He fucking played with me! I trusted him!-  
-And he broke that trust! There’s nothing left to do!-

Kouyou groaned and then looked at Yuu who kept sobbing, far away from all the sudden catastrophe. Yutaka stepped back hoping that everything would be all right now.

-I trusted you too- Kouyou said this time in a more calm voice –Grab your things, I want you out of my house right now-

He walked away, maybe towards his room. Yuu stopped him by grabbing his wrist and turning him around

-I didn’t do anything! He played with me too!-   
-I’m no idiot Yuu. Grab your fucking things and get OUT!-

Kouyou pulled at his hand but Yuu hold was strong. His sobbing also got louder

-I would never do that to you…- he said between sobs, gasping for air –I promised you remember? I promised I would never hurt you!-  
-But you did!-

Kouyou grabbed at his chest, his hand fisting the fabric with force until his knuckles turned white

-You don’t know the pain I feel right now…I feel betrayed, I feel like a fucking fool because I loved you! I fucking gave you my heart and what the hell did you do with it?! You broke it and made me believe in a goddamn fairy tale!-

Yuu shook his head

-That’s not true!-   
-The only thing that isn’t true is you! Why?! You knew me inside out Yuu, you knew all about my demons and all about my dreams…and I really felt loved! I really did! I felt that I could finally be happy because I had someone who actually loved me! And you lied!-

Kouyou pulled one more time at his hand, this time breaking free

-A week ago…a week ago I really felt I found what I was looking for-

Their eyes met one more time. And that’s where Yuu knew he lost him: because his eyes weren’t full of love and kindness. They were cold, selfish and full of anger. The eyes of a viper were back…

Kouyou turned back into Takashima

-I love you Kouyou!- The younger screamed at the top of his lungs –All I said a week ago is true! I love you with all my heart and it hurts so much right now! Please! Please! Trust me!-

The older man chuckled

-You didn’t love me enough…stop humiliating yourself. I don’t want to see you ever again. Yutaka, help him pack his shit and get out of my house-

He turned around and kept walking to somewhere inside the house

-Tell your sorry excuse of a lover that I’ll pay him the rest of the contract-

Yuu whole world crumbled under his hands

Yutaka got closer to him, pulling him into a hug and whispering soft nothings into his ear. Things that Yuu didn’t want to hear. They both only packed the basic stuff Yuu brought into the house, he left most of it behind not wanting to bring back old memories.

A few hours later they were on the road to Toxic

Yuu still sobbing and with red eyes from crying, looked at his new life. He would go back to everything he had, missing the most important piece of it all.

Yutaka parked in front of the big building

-Yuu…I’m really sorry for all you had to hear. Please if you ever need anything, contact me. I’ll help you with anything you need-

The younger Takashima really seemed out of this world. A softer gaze, a bright smile…

A heart with no darkness

-I will Yutaka…thank you for everything-   
-Don’t even mention it. I’m really sorry-

The brunette pulled him into a hug and then got out of the car, helping him with all his bags. Yuu waved him goodbye and then knocked at the door of Toxic.

_I don’t want to see you ever again_

But I do…

Takanori opened the door. The blood and bruises remaining on his face. His blue eyes looked shocked when he saw Yuu but, as soon as the raven haired hugged him, he could care less about the world. He had his Yuu back in his arms and that’s all that mattered for now

While Yuu and Takanori shared another hug, at the other side of the city Kouyou fidgeted with a .45 in his hands

_Nobody is going to love you_

Kouyou heard her voice as soon as he stepped inside his office. He had a gun tucked in one of the many drawers of his desk, a gift from his father just a few months after he turned 21. It was a good souvenir back in the day. Now it was loaded…Kouyou felt stupid, all he needed was one bullet. He grabbed the gun and sat down in the ground in front of his desk

_You’re a dirty, dirty boy. Nobody is going to love you_

-I guess you were right at the end, ma’am- he sighed –And I thought you lied all the time…-

_Will you be my partner in crime Yuu?_

He pulled back the hammer of the gun; the barrel rolled signaling it was ready to shoot

_Always making stupid questions; I thought I already was_

He placed the gun inside his mouth and his finger inside the trigger. He closed his eyes slowly

Yutaka entered the house and just when he was about to close the front door, he heard a gunshot.

_________________________________________________________________

_“In other news, from today is been five years since the CEO of Hellion, Kouyou Takashima went missing and the vicepresident Tanabe Yutaka took his place. Many rumors have appeared across the years but we have nothing that is confirmed as official. This mystery remains unsolved”_

Yuu watched the news with a lump on his throat

Is been five years since he broke up with Kouyou in the most bizarre and painful way. A few weeks after that, Yutaka came out in a press conference revealing to everyone that he was the new CEO of the company and making no comments about the state of Kouyou

Where could he be? Was he okay? Did he…?

No, he couldn’t. He was okay…at least that’s what he wanted to believe

-What the hell is that?-

Right now he was in Toxic, just a few hours away from a new auction. Yuu was sitting at one of the bar stools while Akira cleaned the glasses and prepared everything for the night. The raven haired boy was 26 now, he finished college and started helping Takanori with the auctions thanks to his wonderful charisma and his great ability to sell things.

Takanori sat just beside him, placing an arm around his shoulders

-Some news about the hormonal version of Tony Stark- Akira said with a smirk, Takanori chuckled   
-What? He is still missing?-   
-Yeah. Five years now. That’s one hell of a beach trip isn’t it?-  
-The fucker probably hanged himself or something like that. He is better dead, really. Don’t you think Yuu?-

Yuu looked at him with sadness

-He is a human being Takanori. You never got to meet him that’s why you say all that shit-   
-Oh come on. Don’t tell me he had a kind heart?-

_He did. Before you fucked everything up_

Yuu said nothing and went back to watch the TV.

Suddenly the door bell rang. Yuu went to open, shorting the way by running a bit

He opened the door slightly

-I’m sorry buddy but we’re closed right now. Come back at 7 o’clock-  
-Yuu?-

The voice behind the door made him frown. He fully opened the piece of wood

A brunette man with a black suit looked back at him. He had longer hair, a more muscular body, he still kept the softer gaze but his bright smile had disappeared. Yuu expected the worse

-Yutaka?-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me. Please don't hate meeeee
> 
> So I wanted to write a short story since I usually don't have a lot of time to write and stuff and this idea came out...however, in the middle of everything I realized that I couldn't squeeze all of the original plot in 11 chapters (and that I already left out crucial plot points and character development) so I wrote this ending and choose to make a sequel with everything that's missing. 
> 
> Thank you very much for reading this story, really. You all deserve a box full of Black Moral merch and Gazette tickets. This has been a wonderful journey and I poured my heart into this so the fact that you guys like the story makes me feel a lot better. Thank you thank you x100,000. 
> 
> See you soon (I hope) with the sequel!


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